It Would Have Been Slightly Funnier If He Had Used A Ball Pean Hammer, But What Can Ya Do?

I'm definitely a believer in the idea of to each his own, but it's hard to argue that there's nothing wrong with a guy who gets his kicks by jacking off in public view (blinds were up and front door was wide open) using a
claw hammer,
plastic bag and motor oil.

I've been writing this blog for almost 5 years now, was doing weird news reports on the radio long before that and keeping tabs on things like this for as far back as I can remember, and even I can't believe I just wrote those words in combination. That's almost enough to make getting it on with
bikes
and
picnic tables
seem reasonable.

If young Ronald Miller doesn't end up in a database somewhere, those guys should round up
this guy
and start a riot.