Trixie's Famous, Why Leave Babs in the Shadows?

I figured since Trixie could be famous, Babs at least deserves her moment in the sun. So I dug up a picture of her and added it to her announcement post. So now you can know what both pups look like and compare.

Hopefully I'll have something of greater substance to say later.

Well, If Bush Can Be President...

MySpace backs reality TV presidential race

I'm not sure what to say about this. I'd say we're doomed, but that would be news to just about no one. And this whole concept would seem a lot more out there and ridiculous than it does if the last 7 years hadn't happened.

Should They Keep their Little Girl Little?

This is just scary, and something about it rubs me the wrong way.

Parents of a 9-year-old girl named Ashley, who refuse to be identified but have no problem putting Ashley's picture everywhere, have decided that she shouldn't grow anymore, so have started pumping her full of hormones and putting her through surgeries to prevent her from getting any bigger than 4 feet five inches and 75 pounds.

This is their story. She has a condition called static encephalopathy. This means she is severely mentally handicapped and can't walk or talk, or keep her head up, roll over or sit up by herself. So this will make it easier for them to take her on outings if she's easier to carry.

This is what has been done to her. She has had a hysterectomy, surgery to prevent breast growth and subsequent high doses of estrogen to slow her growth.

Ok, I get that it would be hard to care for her if she can't sit up or do anything on her own, but what I'm worried about is what all this estrogen and hormone therapy will do to her in the long term. They may be able to carry her, but she may end up with cancer or who knows what else? Wouldn't it just be simpler to have a little more care in the house than to completely and utterly mess with her body? I'm sure the expense would equal out to be about the same.

I just don't like their attitude. Like I said before, they have pictures of her and they black out everyone else, they refuse to have an interview, but they'll send emails to reporters, they have a website where they only have material that supports their side of things, and there's something that just doesn't sit right with me. Maybe they're the most loving couple in the world, but they look like publicity hounds who like to give us the appearance that they care for their daughter so people will see them as heroes. It reminds me of another kid I knew. She was deaf and blind, couldn't talk and was in a wheelchair. Her parents would go on TV talking about how much they loved her and would do anything for her, but send her to school dirty, in crappy clothes and tell her caregivers they were employed to make their tea. We could only imagine that the reason they kept her around was so they could profit from a settlement she got since her condition was due to a car accident.

Let's just hope Ashley, their "pillow angel" as they call her because she never moves from where they put her, usually on a pillow, doesn't develop any unexpected side-effects from these body modifications they've done to her. I just feel kinda sick now.

The Bad Idea Fairy Visited Me Again

If you're like us and enjoy reading about goofy or downright stupid things that people have invented, then you'll probably get a kick out of
this piece from Wired Magazine
about some of the dumbest things ever created.

The article features among other things a human powered helicopter pogo stick, underwear with airbags in them, and glasses for people who only have one eye that will try to make it look as though the person actually has 2.

Have fun.

Ooo! Look at the Doggy!

God it's nice to be home, and settling back in with the pooch. She's so fast, and people are always startled at how fast we can motor. Somebody asked me if she had a slow button. That made me laugh, because at the time she asked, I didn't even think we were zooming that quickly. But I notice that what used to take me 10 minutes now takes me 3.

But it's always a bit of an adjustment to deal with the public and the querky things they do as soon as there's a dog involved. I swear, just bring a dog into the room and you could conduct a study on social behaviour. Then you find out who in the group are the mature ones, and who are easy to turn into little children.

Where should I begin? I guess with the way conversation shifts as soon as people see us, er, actually, as soon as people see Trixie. As I'm getting on the bus, I notice that the general conversation changes from "nice weather...look at that guy with the weird hair...so did you hear that story on the news.." to "dog...dog...dog...doggy!...what a nice dog...labs are so cute...etc. I always know it's coming, it can just be a little overwhelming sometimes.

Then there are the strange people that seem to be drawn to me. I used to get on a bus and sit down and not much would be said to me, except for the usual stuff, and occasionally someone would ask me a million questions about blindness. Now people work to sit beside me just so they can be close to the pooch. Sometimes, it's an average joe, but most times, it's the world's biggest freak! I had one guy sit down beside me and then tell me his age and start to flirt with me and tell me all about how he got married, got divorced six years later, and how girls don't seem to stay around...and how old might I be? Yuckers. Come on bus, either dump me or him off!

Another goof sat down beside me and decided to talk to me about all the different TV shows that had dogs in them. We had to talk about the Littlest Hobo, Lassie, Clifford the Big Red Dog, Rin Tin Tin, Scooby Doo, anything with a dog in it. I know the dog can be a conversation piece, but...this is a little much!

Now let's jump straight to the concept of not petting the guide dog when it's working. Ok, I get that some people, through some bizarre chain of events or the fact that they're three years old, don't know that this is a standard thing. I have no problem educating them on this. I tell them that the dog has to focus, and if it's trying to earn pets from random passers-by, that will likely overrule what the dog is supposed to do, i.e. make sure I don't do a face-plant into a planter or have a not so nice collision with traffic. They usually understand and apologize. If I'm lucky, people will ask *before* they start malling Trixie.

But here's something to really get me steamed. A guy, while talking to me, plants his hand squarely on Trixie and starts petting her. To stop him, I reach down and put my hand over his and ask him nicely to stop. This is his response. "I know we're not supposed to pet them while they're working, but..." But what? Please tell me what the but is. But they're too cute? show some self-control! Do you walk up to a cute baby and start patting its head? What other possible reasons could there be? But they don't get enough attention and I think it's cruel? Does this dog look miserable? I've been told she even wags her tail while working. Trust me, she gets lots of attention. I've always loved Trixie, I love dogs, otherwise I wouldn't have done this, and every time I go on a walk with her, I love her more and more, so on top of the praise she gets while she's working, she gets oodles of attention when we're home. These people have to realize that they're slowly putting me in danger by petting the cute puppy.

Then some people, while trying to direct me where to go, try and grab Trixie's leash and use it like a bridle and bit. No, although that looks like the easy way, it's not the way to go. she's not a horse, give me the directions and I'll tell the dog. Or, they go, "Here Trixie, here doggy!" I know they mean well and think this is good, but that's about as dangerous as petting the dog because it distracts the poor dog from leading me and listening to me. And I don't want her to start coming to random people who walk by and say, "here, puppy."

And what is with people's compulsion to call the dog a he even though I've said she's a she several times? Next time a girl says "isn't he cute?" after I've said "her name is Trixie" or "she's wonderful," I'm going to call the girl "sir" to get the point across.

It's also funny to watch people's first reaction when they see her. They either start jibbering at us, even if we're crossing a street, or you hear them take a breath in and watch in silence as we go by. It's kind of cute to watch.

Three common questions I get, and their answers:

1. "Did you get her from the CNIB?" No. I know that it would make sense that the CNIB would do the guide dog thing, but they don't. They like to stay neutral and not affiliate with guide dog schools. So no one gets their dog from the CNIB.

2. "Doesn't the dog interpret the traffic lights and read the street signs?" Nope, knowing when it's safe to cross and knowing where I'm going are my parts of the deal. She just tries to make sure I don't become road pizza or slam into poles on the way there.

3. "How old is she? She must be only six months old!" Nope, she's 2. She's small, but so am I. That's as big as she's going to get.

I think that's it. I'm sure I'll have more stories as we go. One thing about having a guide woofer, life is never dull.

Now, There are Telescreens!

*rumble rumble rumble*. What's that sound? I'm not sure, but I think it's originating from George Orwell's grave. Yes, george Orwell is rolling over, and over, and over again! Why? Because in the UK, the CCTV's that Big Brother, er, police can use to watch and listen to you as you go down the street can now yell at disorderly passers-by. It is, it is, 1984. Everyone, stay away from the UK!

All I Wanna Do Is Wipe My Bum

Let me start this off by saying that if it weren't for ideas that sounded crazy but actually worked, our world would be a much different place than it is today. But that said, not every crazy idea turns out to be a good one, and as much as some may want to argue, sometimes you can spot a bad one from miles away.

Such is the case with a recent suggestion
put forward
by Sheryl Crow, who on a recent climate change awareness tour proposed that toilet paper use be limited to 1 square per visit. No, I'm not making this up.

"I have spent the better part of this tour trying to come up with easy ways for us all to become a part of the solution to global warming. Although my ideas are in the earliest stages of development, they are, in my mind, worth investigating," she writes.

"One of my favorites is in the area of conserving trees, which we heavily rely on for oxygen.

"I propose a limitation be put on how many squares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting.… We can make it work with only one square per restroom visit."

Crow acknowledges there could be occasions when the one-square limit might not suffice, such as "on those pesky occasions where two to three could be required."

She writes that when she presented the idea to her younger brother, he went a step further, suggesting that people could "just wash the one square out."

I wonder if it ever dawned on her that her brother might have been making fun of her like brothers tend to do from time to time. I get the sense that he's not though, and if that's so, I might have to curl up in a ball and sob until I dehydrate.

There are so many flaws in this plan that I'm not sure where to begin. Perhaps the 1-square limit would be a good place to start. Who wipes with only one square, and how? Those squares are so small and flimsy that they're barely good enough to stand up to a single pass let alone the 3 or 4 it usually takes to sufficiently clear the debris. And what about the ladies? Isn't wiping out 2 places with the same shit ticket a bit of an infection risk even if you do try to wash out the square? Speaking of which, is there a lot of drug use in the Crow family or am I just using the wrong kind of toilet paper? In case you haven't noticed, liquid and butt wipe go together about as well as Sheryl Crow and a decent song after the mid 1990's.

Not all of her ideas are bad. I kind of like the one about the detachable sleeve that you can use as a napkin when you eat so you don't have to use paper towels. But I know dumb when I see it, and until there's a good alternative to toilet paper, this is dumb.

How Long Until People Start Getting Addicted To The Shower?

Soap gives caffeine kick

Here's a free piece of advice. If you regularly feel so rushed that you find yourself having to choose between having a coffee or having a shower, and if you think even for a minute that Caffeinated soap might just be the answer to your problems, it might be time to slow things down a tad.

AttenTV: A Great Idea If You're A Creep, A Loser Or Just Don't Have Any Respect For Yourself And Your Privacy

Can somebody please tell me where the appeal is in
this?

I'll break it down quickly for the benefit of those of you who don't have time to read a long article.

A new service called AttenTV allows people to download a browser plug-in that will record and broadcast their clickstreams for others to watch. If you don't know what a clickstream is, it's a record of everything you click on while you're on the internet. And if you don't know what watching is, well, I'm afraid there's little to no hope for you.

I know what some of you are thinking right now, and yes, this is what it sounds like and yes, I'm pretty sure we did used to call things like it spyware back in the day. There are differences between AttenTV and spyware, though not many from where I sit. It reportedly won't show password protected content, you can turn it off and on as well as filter out specific sites, and you have to download it yourself. but the big question I have is why would you want to?

First of all, you have no idea who's watching you. Did I miss the memo about cyberstalking no longer being a problem? And why would you want to turn yourself into big brother, or if not big brother, then pesky neighbourhood gossip who seems to know a little something about everybody?

And those questions don't even begin to address the issue of why anybody who doesn't have any creepy intentions would care what you're looking at, or why you would think they would. Trust me, you're neither that important or exciting. And to anybody who would actually want to watch somebody surf the internet, please, go outside and walk around in the world, or at the very least pick up the phone and talk to another human being until you regain your senses and maybe even figure out how and where your life went so horribly, horribly wrong.

The people behind the AttenTV concept, who are obviously angling to turn it into a money-making venture, like to say that it's no different than visiting a website and having that website place a cookie on your machine. What I feel I can safely discern from this line of reasoning is that the people behind the AttenTV concept haven't a clue how cookies actually work. I'll break that one down too. When you visit a site, it will put a cookie on your machine. However, that cookie will not log everything you do after it gets there and share it with anyone who asks. Basically, a cookie is a little "hey how's it goin'" between you and the website you went to, while AttenTV is more of a "hey universe, check out what Steve's lookin' at in snappy detail!"

When you think about all of the different aspects of this idea, you're still left with the same big question. Why would you want to? Why would you want to expose your internet comings and goings to the entire world? Why would you want to give up more of your privacy for the financial gain of others who's aim is to help advertisers serve you more ads? And why would you want to entrust that kind of data to people who don't know the difference between spyware and a cookie? I don't know about you, but I don't, and even though I've never used the "service", it looks like a loser on all counts to me and I probably never will.

I Apologize For Every Newfy Joke I've Ever Made

Honestly, I do. I've met a pretty good number of Newfoundlanders in my life, and almost all of them have been some of the nicest people you could ever hope to run into, and I don't even mean with your car. And no matter what people say about them, I haven't met a single Newfy who could come close to being as retarded as these folks from Arkansas, or as I used to call it until today, Newfoundland South.

What you're about to read came to me in 2 different emails from 2 different places less than 10 minutes apart. I'd find that a lot stranger if stuff like that didn't happen to me all the time, but it's still something I laugh at and wonder about whenever it happens.

First we have
a news article
about a religious nutcake who wants people to be fired and $20000 in cash because his teenaged sons found a book about lesbians in a *public* library and were traumatized by it.

A Bentonville, Ark., man is seeking $20,000 from the city after his two teenage sons found a book on lesbian sex on a public library bookshelf.

He also wants the library director fired.

Earl Adams said his 14- and 16-year-old sons were "greatly disturbed" after finding the book, titled "The Whole Lesbian Sex Book." Adams said the book caused "many sleepless nights in our house."

Adams said the book is "patently offensive and lacks any artistic, literary or scientific value," according to a letter he faxed to Mayor Bob McCaslin. He said the teenagers found it while browsing for material on military academies.

Adams wants the city to pay $10,000 to each of his sons. That's the maximum allowed under the Arkansas obscenity law. However, the city's attorney dismissed Adams' claim as baseless. She said the book is not pornographic.

"There is not a valid legal concern here," Camille Thompson said. "In fact, (the request for money) made me question his motivation."

The library's advisory board voted earlier this month to remove the book from circulation. Board member George Spence said he found the book crude, but said it could be replaced with one taking a "more sensitive, more clinical approach."

In an e-mail Thursday, Adams said that "God was speaking to my heart that day and helped me find the words that proved successful in removing this book from the shelf."

He said he would fight any effort to put the book back on shelves.

"Any effort to reinstate the book will be met with legal action and protests from the Christian community," Adams wrote in the e-mail.

I know this probably won't help matters any, but here's my small and dare I say noble effort to prevent this type of confusion from happening in the future.

pub·lic   
[puhb-lik]
–adjective
1.
of, pertaining to, or affecting a population or a community as a whole: public funds; a public nuisance.
3.
open to all persons: a public meeting.
4.
of, pertaining to, or being in the service of a community or nation, esp. as a government officer: a public official.
5.
maintained at the public expense and under public control: a public library; a public road.
8.
open to the view of all; existing or conducted in public: a public dispute.
10.
of or pertaining to all humankind; universal.
–noun
11.
the people constituting a community, state, or nation.
12.
a particular group of people with a common interest, aim, etc.: the book-buying public.

Taken from
Dictionary.com.

Hopefully we've all got this straight now. The public is not just you, the public is all of us. You do not speak for the public, at least not all of it. So unless you want to build your own private libraries or start your own private broadcasting facilities, shut the fuck up and accept the fact that like it or not, everybody is the public and we're all just a little bit different. Everything done for the public good is about striking the right balance, which does not mean that every crackpot gets exactly what he wants when he wants it. Every crackpot has the right to a voice, but the rest of us have an equal right to ignore that voice. It's one of those things that makes the society you think you're protecting with your what's good for me is good for everybody else attitude so great.

Speaking of voices we should be ignoring, here's a letter that Randy Cassingham dug out of the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette and posted
on Jumbo Joke.
By the way, where it says warning in the headline, it's supposed to say warming. The letter was posted on April 16th, and nobody from the crack editing staff has fixed it yet. then again, that might explain how something this stupid could make it into a newspaper.

Daylight exacerbates warning*

You may have noticed that March of this year was particularly hot. As a matter of fact, I understand that it was the hottest March since the beginning of the last century. All of the trees were fully leafed out and legions of bugs and snakes were crawling around during a time in Arkansas when, on a normal year, we might see a snowflake or two. This should come as no surprise to any reasonable person. As you know, Daylight Saving Time started almost a month early this year. You would think that members of Congress would have considered the warming effect that an extra hour of daylight would have on our climate. Or did they ? Perhaps this is another plot by a liberal Congress to make us believe that global warming is a real threat. Perhaps next time there should be serious studies performed before Congress passes laws with such far-reaching effects.

CONNIE M. MESKIMEN / Hot Springs

When I was first reading all of this stuff, the only thing I could think was you know, the next time the Americans feel like bombing someplace back to the dark ages, why not consider Arkansas? But the more I think about it, there's probably no point. Judging from what I've seen today, they're already there.

Talk to the Twin

Wow. This is just weird. An Australian company called MyCyberTwin.com has come up with a program that is an artificial intelligence and can chat to your friends for you. Then, you can read what your friend and this twin said later.

Process that for a while. There are enough people who go online, but find the conversations so monotonous that they'd rather have a machine talk to their friends for them so they can do better things. It even says you can program the twin to answer repetitive questions like "Are you and so and so really an item?" In my opinion, if you're having so many conversations on autopilot like some kind of zombie, that means it's time to get new friends!

There is a cool side to this program, if used by businesses. It would mean faster responses to common questions.

I'd like to talk to one of these and see how person-like it is. I've talked to chatterbots before, ***oh no, I've just proclaimed my geekhood***, and you can tell they're a bot. They say some amusing things, but nothing that you'd say realistically in a conversation. This company claims they're not perfect, but better than most bots. I'm curious.

I'm waiting for the day when people don't block people anymore, they just leave the annoying person to talk to their CyberTwin, and read the logs later and laugh. Now that I think about it, that might be kind of fun.

Bingo Hall...Bridge Club...Bingo Hall...Bridge Club...

The first time I read this, I was very, very sad. Our collective IQ must be deteriorating if even inventors are getting stupid.

Ok, here's the premise. They want to take Alzheimers patients and give them RFID tags so their caregivers can track their wanderings and, in theory, come find them when they get lost. The base has a range, and when the tag goes out of range, it alerts with an alarm. They claim that this would give the Alzheimers patient more freedom to rome. Anybody see a problem with this? I see several.

First off, the thing only beeps when the person goes out of range, so how do you go about finding your dear old lost soul? You would have to go in four directions if you wanted to have a hope of finding them.

Second, these folks aren't the type who should be left free to rome. If their alzheimers is so serious that you're worried they'll wander off, when they're "roming", they're not off to the store to get some milk or going down the street to visit a friend. Maybe they think they're off to the store for milk, but they're thinking of a store near where they used to live. Maybe they're wanting to visit a friend who is now dead. Then they get lost. They most likely need supervision, not tracking! I understand that could be hard for family members, but if the person needs to be watched so closely, perhaps it's time for the family to get some help caring for that person.

Third, the inventors of this stuff shouldn't delude themselves for a second. People with degrees of dementia have moments of clarity, and in one of those, they could remove your handy dandy tracker before going off on a jaunt that they knew would be out of range, or they could just get pissed that you were making them wear an electronic monitoring device like some house arrest prisoner and remove it. Lots of Alzheimers patients are very angry as the memory slips more and more. wouldn't you be if you think of yourself as independent, and now everything that you consider to be a solid recollection of what you've done is questioned, and you forget who these people are who are managing your life?

Finally, I think this thing gives caregivers too much peace of mind. They think they can just leave the person alone because the tracker will beep if they wander off. Hey dude, the tracker won't beep if they leave the stove on and almost burn the house down, or drop something on themselves. They still need supervision!

I think we're too quick to replace old-fashioned ways of doing things with technology that lets us sit back and do nothing. Sometimes that works, but sometimes it just makes no sense! I'm waiting for the first lawsuit filed when someone's dear old grandma gets hurt and nobody knew about it because the tracker didn't go off to tell them something was wrong.

What's This? A Normal Life?

Finally! I'm home and starting to feel like a normal human being again! For the first few days, I was so overwhelmed. I was trying to figure out where the dog fit into my day, plus trying to read the fifty odd emails I had set aside to read when I got home, plus decompressing from the crazy schedule and helping my poor beast adjust to eastern time. It took me all week to get through the emails and get everything straight, but I think it's finally happening.
I just wanted to say thanks to everyone who showed interest in one way or another in my little journey to California. I got some pretty cool comments and emails out of the deal, I even got emailed by a couple of alumni from GDB! Sometimes, a guy who raised puppies for another school would email me. We've even had google searches that just had my name and Trixie's name. We're famous!

A small update on my knee: I definitely need physio. I'm not in the horrible agony I was, but I've fallen down hills and when I walk anywhere long and drawn out, which has become 2 blocks, I need someone to be there for support. This isn't like me. So I'm heading in for Physio on Tuesday. Let's hope it helps.

Here's a picture of Trixie...and me. I think she should be the star, but this is the best I can do. Isn't she cute? Now that I've said that, I will have uploaded the photo wrong and she'll look like some kind of hideous demon dog. That happened to a friend of mine. She was looking at her dog's picture on the computers at the dorm, and Zoomtext, another program to enlarge text, was on, and somehow it had inverted the colours so it looked like a negative. So her dog looked black with glowing eyes and a white nose and she looked like an old man. So let me know if she looks good.

I have a couple more blog posts in store. Hopefully I can get them up soon.

Hope everyone is having the gorgeous weather we're having! Spring just might be here! Maybe? Possibly? Could it be? If not, I guess we'd better enjoy it.

Carin's Guide Dog Diary: Day 29

Oh my god. I'm on the plane. My beautiful beast is at my feet. I'm...done! She's mine and I made it!

This morning I couldn't sleep past 3. I ran around my room and tried to make sure everything was packed. I pray I'm not heading for an adrenal crash. My body is trying to tell me something, but let's just hope that if I do crash, it'll be small.

I packed up my poor beast's fleece. I don't think she slept a wink, the poor baby. Every day I love her more and more. Sometimes I was afraid that we weren't bonding, but I think we're fine. Everyone says she settles well beside me and looks happy, and I feel like someone amputated part of my arm if I leave without her. I mean there are times when it's easier to not have the beast on the end of my arm, but I have to know where she is and all that or I'm not content either. Anyway I don't think she slept well, poor baby.

When I got up I guess I made a bit of a racket with my hoppy limp step, but it's a good thing I did because I woke up Jill, Amy and Sylvia who almost overslept. Woopsers.

My little angel pooped and peed, which is good because we're about to fly. Oh my poor Californian pooch who has never seen snow. My poor poor Californian pooch.

We got on the bus, and we gradually went from loud to silent. Everybody's exhausted, especially Amy, Jill and Sylvia. Poor Amy now has to pay the bill from her trip to the ER when she had her seizure at the beginning. Man am I ever thankful that Canada has the health care it does, even with its problems.

I hate goodbyes, especially when we're all groggy. I was the first one off. They took me to the counter, and...that was that. A goodbye and my passport was being checked through. then I was led to the security gate, and if I thought the security check was thorough on Wednesday, they had surprises for me. We went through and beeped like we always do, then they asked me if I'd like a private room or if we could do it in public. Beginning to feel a wee bit afraid of what they were going to do, I said I guess a private room. Then she was bellowing at the other women, "I need a female assist!" And they touched me everywhere. My boobs, my butt, I had to take my medicine I had for on the plane out of my pocket, my poop bags, and they even opened Trixie's leash luggage and inspected more poop bags and her gental leader. One of the women was afraid she'd bite her. Dear god. She'd kiss her instead of biting her. So, surprise surprise, I wasn't set to explode so through I went. Two bags checked, one bag carry-on, my purse, my fanny pack and my elba here..and of course, my little buddy...who just got us bumped up to executive class. How absolutely awesome. I'm being treated like a princess. The guy got me breakfast, which was good because I didn't get a chance to have breakfast before leaving and all they had was dry cereal. I've never felt so waited on in my life. And my little beast flies well. She was a little disturbed at first, but now she's laying here at my feet. I wasn't the best at getting her into my foot space, but there's no one beside me so she's got lots of room. eeewww this movie is disgusting. Oh well, maybe it will get undisgusting. I hope so.

I hate not being able to touch Trixie. Her leash is looped around my knee and she feels like she's chillin', but I'd like to scritch scratch her ears. The tray table is keeping me from getting to her though, that and my ouchy knee.

My stomach is a little unsettled. I hope it calms down soon. I'm so tired but so awake. I'm afraid to nap in case Trixie rises and starts moving. I know she's tied to me, but still. A little over 2 hours to go. Funny how this flight feels like it's going faster than the other one. Always that way, isn't it? tired. sleepy.

I slept a little. Damn it I didn't do a customs card. Erg. Now the agents will have to do it when we get there. Get this. The flight attendents aren't authorized to do it. It's a basic card. Arg just help me fill it out! Ug I hate that. Someone keeps sounding like one of the instructors. There's this heat hitting my jeans pockets. It must be sunny out. But apparently it's only 3 degrees. I'm gonna have a brutal shock ahead of me. Not as much as my poor pooch. Must remember when we land that her handle, my coat and the bag are stowed. Handle, coat, bag. Everything else is tied to me somehow. Much love to the detachable handle.

Piss piss piss! Shit crap hell damn crap crap hell! I knew I forgot something. Deep down at the bottom of my suitcase is a binder, and in that binder is Trixie's health certificate. Piss hell shit crap damn hell piss! How the hell am I going to dig it up? Piss! Oy! I thought I'd remember that. Saboo! And there's a big bag of dogfood in my bag, 3 days' worth, and I don't know if that's legal. Oh cross your fingers for me. Oh god oh no. piss hell. Hope for me. We descend in about an hour. Hopefully nothing goes bad.

Some things I forgot to say before that I keep forgetting to add in:

Clyde is funny. He's the retrain, or retread as we started calling them, who liked to play the organ. Apparently he's a really good dancer and taught the nurse to tango in her office. Don't get any ideas, it's just the tango. Anyway, when we were talking about my bum knee, he even knew of a dance you could dance if you had to hold one leg stiff all the time. He's funny. He's 85 and he's getting another dog.

Bahia puked at the grad ceremony. I wonder why.

sedgey's paw is better. I don't know if I mentioned that. and his ear is better. Meredeth doesn't have a broken doggy anymore.

I don't like the fact that Dynamo, or double D as Amy calls him, still has to pee a lot. I hope she can resolve that. Makes me a wee tad nervous.

My stupid brace. I can hardly wait to get something better. My feet are tired. The way she's positioned, if I put my feet down they'll rest on her and that wouldn't be nice. I don't mind her head on my foot, but my feet on her? No. Poor beast. I can't even imagine not having any control over my destiny, but being smart enough to wonder what's going on but not be able to ask. Maybe I think about it too much, but the poor thing has been shuttled around so much. You will settle down, Trixie, you will.

Please let this flight end soon. I don't feel the best, and I'm not uber comfortable because of the feet thing.

That is the weirdest headphone setup I've ever seen. They don't clip too well to my ears.

I should probably think about getting Trixie some ice. The poor beast can't ask for a thing.

I still haven't set my watch. I should do that at some point. We should be landing within the hour.

We landed! I tried to limp through the airport but I didn't do well, so Trixie and I got a ride in a golf cart. Trixie-poo, you've now ridden on buses, subways, cars, and golf carts! She's doing really well! She already knows where my apartment door is, where the elevator is, where her relieving spot is, and she's already pooped and peed a couple times, and no diarrhea! I've got her food, her puppy raisers are sending her a bed, she's quietly nestled on tiedown in my bedroom, and she's taken a trip to the emergency room with me where I found out that my MCL is a bit torn and that I'll have to get physio. Heall, damn it, heal! She's an angel dog. I just feel bad that at first the walks will be really short.

So now the real hard work begins. My journey is only beginning. Hope you enjoyed the first leg.

Carin's Guide Dog Diary: Day 26

Notes from Steve: Here's day 26. Turns out Carin messed up my email address when she sent it out. Guess I know how important I am now, hahaha. I mean of all the people to not remember...Gees. Ridiculous.

Also, Carin made it home without incident yesterday and her and Trixie are both settling in nicely. I'm sure you'll all be hearing a lot more about how things are going as time goes on.

Ok, here's Carin.

Hope for me, keep cheering, I'm almost there.

This morning we all got the scoop on what kind of environments our puppies were raised in. It's so cool about Al's dog Bahia. She was exposed to all kinds of music, which is good because Al was all worried about whether or not he could take her along when he plays music.

Then, while everyone went to Berkeley, I went with the retrains and did rounded corners, which is what I missed the other day when I was completely out of commission. Much to my dismay, the brace started sliding down and Helen was off with the regular class. So I had to hobble through the walk with an ineffective immobilizer. So we only went 3 blocks and turned around. I'm now affectionately called hop-along. This rounded corners thing is weird. Because the corners are rounded, she'll sort of veer around the corner and you have to feel for her to straighten out. Then you have to halt her and tell her to hop up and she'll line you up with the curb. I can feel the veer, I can't feel the straightening out, but she seems to show me the curb, so sweet, I don't have to fix it.

When I got back here we had a little free time, so I ran to the computer. I feel bad. People email me, and I can only write back short responses. Someone asked me some questions about technology and all I could manage was, "Ug, can I tell you about it when I get home?" People are asking me deep questions about why I want a dog, etc. and all I can say is "I'll tell you more when I get home." I really don't mean to be rude. It's just I'm checking the email via the web and I want to at least say something but I don't have the time, or sometimes the mental energy, to say nearly what I want to say. Hope people understand.

I went to the nurse to get the brace adjusted, and she showed me how to do it myself! How liberating! It's not really uber complicated, just a few things you need to know, and you need to remember to have patience. I'm not the best at it, but if I can't figure it out, I'll bug her one more time and make her watch me do it. I feel like such a slow learner. Oh well.

Lunch was good, a cheeseburger. A lady from Graduate services sat at our table and talked about how she answers the phones that graduates call when they have questions. She seemed nice. After lunch, we got presents! vet packs and dog tags! Now I have a year's supply of heartworm preventative and a year's supply of anti-flea/tic. Yea!

Then they all went on the miracle mile. As soon as I hear the words miracle mile, I cringe right now. So Audrey took me to go and do some island crossings. They're weird. They train them to find the island, then you're supposed to show them the beginning of the island and then walk to the end of the island and then finish the crossing. She talked more about patterning and all that good stuff.

I didn't go on the night route. When Mike asked if I was going to go, a spike of pain shot through my knee and I said no. I won't be going on the hike tomorrow either, sniff sniff. Oh well, that's all small stuf. In 8 years or whenever my puppy retires I'll try again. I mean how likely is it that I'll louse up my knee again? *shouldn't have said that, have now jynxed myself.*

Tonight I talked to my mom. She's so sweet, I could just hug her. She's offering to take me to the doctor the day after I get home. I could just hug her. Ah mommy.

I've gotta start packing. There's a lot to pack and I need to make sure it'll all fit.

Carin's Guide Dog Diary: Day 28

Flop. Graduation over. Tired. Ok, let's run down the day quickly because I want to go to the computers, clean off all my emails, talk to Amy and then fall down so I can get up at 3 or so so we can leave at 4:45. Yee ha. Oh I want to practice one more time getting her into the airplane seats.

I got up this morning and started laundry, woohoo. that being done, I ate breakfast. Sausage, eggs and fruit and sweet roll. Then we had the obedience competition. Damn it, Trixie and I were in the final four teams, all newb teams I might add, and we were supposed to have them stay and I accidentally said stay twice. I disqualified her. Beauty won in the end. Yea nylabones.

Then I was packing and gathering up kibble, etc.

Then, the zoo hit. We had lunch and then got all dolled up.

I met Trixie's puppy raisers, and they are adorable. They gave me a bag full of stuff for her, and they're going to ship me more! They are wonderful people. They're so sad that she's going far away. They couldn't stop hugging me goodbye. Then they took pictures of us together with our puppy raiser. We got to talk more about her puppy habits and how she even gnawed on her nails and licked her belly as a puppy. She was completely out of her tree. How many sit corrections can we dole out in one sitting? But she eventually settled and was a good girl.

Then we had to hand the puppy back to the raiser for the big ceremony. It was raining, so we couldn't go out on the graduation stage. We were in the dining room. So they sat us down and after some speeches about breeders and other puppies, they started calling us up. We'd get handed our puppies, say a few words, and the raiser would say a few words. One, if not both of us, would cry. Then it was all over and we got more time to chat. They couldn't stop hugging me.

Autumn's mom and her friend were there and decided to help me repack my suitcase. I didn't really need the help, but whatever floats your boat, chief. She did help me find a bit of missing money which was cool, and confirm that everything was cleaned out of the closet and drawers minus the PJ's and an outfit. It was a bit overwhelming as they ran around like working little ants packing up Autumn's stuff, then they were in my area, and my head spun. On top of that, I had to feed, water, and relieve my puppy while this was going on. As I was picking up poop, Autumn was saying goodbye. What a crappy way to part ways, har har.

Autumn is gone, Carmen is gone, Al is gone, Meredith is gone, Frank is gone. It's just me, Amy, Bernard, Jill and Sylvia I think, Although I haven't heard a peep out of her. They're going to load our bags for us and we relieve the pups at 4:30 and then be loading by 4:45. Eekers. I'm just going to go to the computers and send a couple days' worth of stuff off, maybe bug Amy for a bit, oh and poop the pup, and maybe, just maybe, fall down for a few hours. I'll have to set the alarm for the last time.

Trixie is tired and confused. She keeps looking over where Autumn and Beauty were, and wondering what on Earth is happening. Poor baby. The poor soul has never seen snow. I don't know what it looks like back home, but I've heard it's icky, slushy, gross. Alright Trix, have a good snooze. I'm off to the computer room and then I'm sure I'll be snoring too.

Carin's Guide Dog Diary: Day 27

Note from Steve: Yes, I realize that we're jumping from day 25 to 27. I'm not sure what happened to 26, but I don't have it. that means that it's either lost in email land somewhere or that one of us made a mistake in the numbering at some point. Since I'm not entirely certain which it is and I can't ask because A it's 4:30 in the morning in California right now and B because Carin's at the airport waiting to come home, I'm just going to go by her numbers. I can always fix it later.

Ok I have to do this one at the end and quickly because it's ten-to-eleven and I need to crash.

Got up and fed Trixie her last pills with her food and all that. Went to breakfast and to see the nurse about the brace. She said I had it on right, just not tight enough and reassured me that I would get it. She told me I must go to Muir Woods, and the route isn't that long. So I decided to go.

The morning meeting was quick, we just got our schedule. Mike shook all our hands and left for a meeting, but not before Carmen played that bloody song. She tried to play it in the wrong key, and I, queen of tact...not...said, "Wrong key, chief." She got the damn song recorded in mp3 and it's going to be given to all the puppy raisers. She's apparently going to sing it at some kind of reception tomorrow. Ug I never want to hear that melody ever again.

Boy am I ever glad I went on the trail. We went down this winding path and boardwalk and all that stuff. The water was peaceful, the birdies sang, Trixie did perfectly, everything was awesome. I didn't make it all the way, but I walked with the nurse and we went a good long ways. She actually strongly advocated that I go and walked right with me. I love Helen.

Then we got hot chocolate and some people checked out a gift shop, a disturbing gift shop if you ask me. Ok, we're at a Redwood preservation park. All the souvenirs are made out of...Redwood. Hmmm. Strange? Yep.

So we left Muir Woods and came back and had lunch. Then, we had a meeting and got given a gynormo binder of goodness with everything we could ever want. I do have one teeny gripe. In that information is a thing about the harness size etc. but it's not available in an alternative format. Um, won't we need that at some point? I'm going to recommend that some of those more important pieces of info be put in an alternative format. But they gave us a ton of shit. Yea ton of shit.

Next we went to the mall. Autumn banged up her knee again today. She thwonked it yesterday so she wasn't going anywhere. So I took her credit card and got her Mrs. Fields cookies and I got myself some C's candy for the plane trip back. The guy in C's candy just couldn't stop giggling at my dog. I think he fell in love with Trixie, either that or he couldn't decide if he loved Storm more. Poor Amy had to buy a whole other suitcase and discovered that it's hard to do guide work and wheel a suitcase. We left the mall and there was a bit of free time, but I ended up on the phone for most of it. Of course I had to feed and relieve puppy and all, but the rest of the time it was yack yack yack. I'm going to pay for that in the morning. I have to do laundry and I have to do it as soon as I get up. Ug.

Then I ran to dinner. Yep, my knee is heeling. Much love, much love to the brace and the patience of the nurses who helped me. Helen especially deserves an award. There are so many people I'd like to give something to. I actually ran to dinner.

After dinner, we had the dumbest lecture ever. It was basically a summary of several lectures. Ug. But then they gave us a tie-down and told us what tomorrow wil hold. Ug. Tomorrow's busy. Then Autumn's mom and friend came and that was cool. They gave Trixie a big, heavy bone...that I can see causing trouble. She does not want to give it up. Ok, serious obedience to come.

I finally took the freelance guide back to its proper place. Then Amy and I got giggling and I finally got to ask her the question of are we cool. I love Amy, but she seems to be a bit of a backstabber. So I asked her, is there any reason that you just can't stand me? I said I've noticed she'll be nice to someone's face and then say all manner of bad things behind their back, and I asked her if she had a problem with me. She said no. So hopefully she isn't a real good liar too.

Now it's late, I mean really late, and I have to get up at 5:45 to start laundry.

Oh yeah, Trixie-boo is Giardia-negative! Do a little dance, jump around and celebrate! No more nasty poops! No more Giardia. Be gone! Out, demon, out! Oh, and that beeping in the hall can stop at any time now.

Carin's Guide Dog Diary: Day 25

Yea! Things are looking up! Yea! First, the brace is staying on longer. They figured out the metal parts bend. Now that they've bent, it'll stay on longer. It will eventually slide down, but it'll stay on longer.

I got up this morning after oversleeping and went to feed Trixie. Then I tried to get her pills but no one was at the office. Being behind schedule, I ran around trying to find someone to give her her pills, plus I had to have my brace tightened. I got my brace tightened and had to give up on the pills until after breakfast. Then they actually let me get the bottle of pills to take back so I don't have to pester them again! Yea! So I had to give her the pills the hard way, i.e. open her mouth, put the pill in, hold her mouth closed and rub her throat until she swallows it. That went ok.

Then I headed out for the bus to go to the airport. They were putting us all through airport security so we'd know what to expect when they screene us. Then the afternoon was the solo route. so anyway I headed out to the bus and we came onboard, and then they said a dog vomited on the bus steps. They were trying to figure out who vomited. Then they got up on the bus and there was more vomit right in front of me. Not a good sign. They said it looked like bile and some kind of food called ID. Um, there they are, phorenzically examining the vomit to see whose dog puked. They can't figure out if it's Trixie who puked, or Clyde's dog. clyde was with us because he decided to go through the security screening because he has a pacemaker too. So anyway, off we went.

The security screening was interesting. Because your dog sets off the alarms, you can either make them sit and stay and walk through, or heel the dog through and both get padded down. I went for the second, I wasn't sure how well the sit stay would work because I'd be holding the end of a leash, which has metal anyway. The key is never let the screener take your dog away from you, and at the end, make sure they reunite you with your shoes and metal things you had to take out of your pockets.

So we went through, and oh my god, the underwire in my bra set off the beeper! How embarrassing. And they had to clear my zipper, I felt like I was being molested. Ickers. At one point she wanted to know what the bulge in my pocket was. I'm like, um, er, it's bags to pick up their, um, erm, waste, ya know, poop. She's like take them out. I'm like sure. Then she just started laughing. Then, when they were wanding the dog, she said something that sounded like "Have her lie on her side." So I tried, and she rolled over on her belly. Then she was really laughing. I had real trouble having her stay sitting. She would sit and then get up again. Erg. But the security lady was really nice. Oy yoy yoy. When they were wanding me, my brace kept setting off alarms because its sides are made of steel. Then they had to rub this thing across my hands and across the brace to check for traces of explosives. Oy yoy yoy.

It was really cool to be able to do this, because we were learning, and they were able to get feedback about how well they did. So we were training them. They must get sick of seeing so many dogs each month. I made it through the whole airport thing without any trouble. Yea immobilizer! Wooo!

Then we came back and had a roast beef sandwich, and I was full. Next we had a lecture from the infamous Brian Francis about Graduate services, and he explained the vet plan. They'll help with $250 worth of basic dog care expenses each year plus the cost of flea and heartworm preventative. And if something huge happens to the poor woofer, they'll help and work out something with you so you pay some and the vet might be able to knock some off. Pretty sweet if you ask me.

Then we went off and did the, gulp, self-orientation or solo route. They dropped Carmen off first, then Sylvia, then Meredeth, then Jill, then me. I got the shortest route, with my gimpy leg. But I still managed to screw stuff up. Ok, it took me forever to figure out where to go after they told me I was at Fifth and E on the south side of Fifth. Hello, all I had to do was cross E, turn, cross fifth, walk straight down E to Fourth, turn down it, find the lounge, you're done. Simple simple simple. But I was like I can't see this in my mind! I totally cracked under pressure. Then I managed to cross, have trouble crossing the next street, then screw up finding the right way to go once I got across, then turn in too soon and end up in another parking lot near the lounge. Eek! That was a very, very, very short route and I still buggered it up. Way to inspire confidence in your instructors. Then we all came home after you had the chance to freelance or stay there. I wasn't moving. I managed to get back in ok shape, but the brace had slid down. Catherine re-adjusted it and I was cool again. She was amazed to here that I was able to relieve her and everything. I just told her I line my left foot up with her and bend primarily from my left side. It was harder, but it was doable. So she may be able to come home with me after all.

Then we got back and we went and relieved her and fed and took her out to relieve again. I'm thinking cool. She's done her duty. So I give her her bone and she has fun with it. Then we go for dinner, sloppy joe's. And I had some apple pie too.

Then, oh then. I took her out on our little patio and was throwing a cong back and forth, and suddenly she started circling the way she does when she's about to drop a poop bomb. I'm like oh no oh no oh no! Sure enough, there's a nice carepackage at my feet. I luckily had a bag and picked it up as best I could, but managed to step in some smeers. Ug. I cleaned off my shoes and brought the present to the instructors so it could be disposed of. Jessica even hosed off the patio for me. Jessica's so sweet.

I got a call from Trixie's puppy raisers! How cool is that? They were all asking me lots of questions and telling me about Trixie. She apparently always had a yellow lab friend. So that's why she loves Beauty so much. Ah it all comes out. They said she loved tug, but on a rope. I have a longer tug toy at home, we'll see if she likes that. They even offered to buy me booties or a doggy bed for the Trixter. I could just hug them! They're coming on Saturday and they want to see her work. Hmmm. I don't know if that's a good idea. I'm going to talk to the instructors. They're so excited to meet me. Oh Saturday is going to be a very emotional day. I'm going to be reduced to a blubbering pile by the end.

Alrighty, crashing now.

Carin's Guide Dog Diary: Day 24

So I woke up this morning filled with this sadness and anger. I was sad because I don't look forward to guide work right now because frankly it hurts. It hurts and I never know when it's going to kill. And I'm mad that this had to happen right at the end, cheating me out of the end of training. I hate this.

I got up and knocked on the instructor's door to get Trixie's pills and couldn't wake them up. So I fed her and they taught me how to put a pill in her mouth and get it down her throat. Fun but it worked. Then I took the brace back to the nurse and got yelled at by Lee. She thought I was the nurse! Um nope. So now they've tied this brace onto me with ace bandages and now they're worried they fastened it too tight. Grrr! I'm supposed to go to the nurse and have it looked at, then deal with my travel insurance shit. Guess who's not going to the warf? Oh and I have my exit interview.

Exit interview over. I gave them a pretty high mark. Somebody got exit interviewed by good old Paulo the stalker! Then I thought I'd try relieving Trixie with this brace on. That went ok, but she didn't really challenge me. Mike says, "Carin, are you pplaying ice hockey or what?" I told him what happened and he says, "We may have to send you home and bring your dog to you when you're well. We'll talk about that later." Well at least they're not kicking me out. But that's certainly not the way I wanted training to end.

So I'm lying here in bed, wishing I could fix the travel insurance disaster, but I can't because they gave me a case number which the nurse wrote down but I didn't have this thing right there to write it down too, and the nurse is of course heading to Fisherman's Warf with the rest of the crew. This sucks. Sucks, blows, bites and puffs too. Here come the cleaning staff. Great. I love them for all they do, but they can be kinda scary. I think they're sick of cleaning our rooms, changing our towels, etc. I would be if that was my job.

I'm laying here listening to Lewis Black and trying to be hopeful.

Well, after laying in bed and feeling completely helpless, I took her to relieve. That went ok, she just peed. Then they called me into the office and said, worst case scenario, they'll send me home at the end of the week and they'd send Trixie to me when I was well enough to care for her. I really don't want that. I don't want to have to keep saying to people, oh the dog isn't here yet, I tore a ligament in my knee, lather, rinse, repeat. Why does this journey have to be so difficult for me? I just wanna get the dog and get on with my life.

I got a call from the people at that job I applied for. "We got your resume and we want an interview. How's Friday?" Excuse me while I restrain my rage. Why do I bother writing a cover letter with explicit details about when I will be available if they won't goddamn read it? I'm thrilled to bits that they want me, it just pisses me off that I have to be painstakingly careful about everything I write in a resume and cover letter if they don't actually, um, read it! The funny part is they phoned me in California. They phoned a goddamn california number and thought I'd be available almost immediately for an interview in Toronto. I think I've been reading too much Lewis Black, I'm feeling his rage.

So I'm sitting here this afternoon wishing I could be out there. My knee actually is feeling somewhat better at this moment.

Oh, I heard who her puppy raisers were. I hope she won't be lonely. She lived in a house with 3 girls, another dog and a cat. She'll have a dude, but no dog or cat. They said she was very vocal [how true], she likes playing tug [what the hell?], she likes taking a shower, loves having her teeth brushed, is very eager to please, and loves people. They even sent pictures, some of her as a wee puppy. And they're coming to graduation. I'm going to cry.

Damn I wish I could do something. This is wicked annoying, My knee feels not half bad now, but they still advise not to push it.

Oh here's some good joy. I called travel insurance and they're saying I have to pay the bill and then give them a goddamn receipt. I can't just send the bill to them. I ask why they thought I purchased travel insurance. Just for fun? So I could have an extra job to do? Yeah, that's it. I didn't actually *need* the coverage, I just sorta wanted it. Grrr. I don't mind putting it on credit if I know I'll get the damn money back quickly, But this is infuriating.

Well, my knee feels pretty good right now. I'm actually quite impressed. Maybe, just maybe, Trixie and I will make it home together on Sunday. Even Frank's rooting for me. I feel guilty for being upset with Frank. He was being very sweet at the table.

Arg. I just spilled water on my lecture CD's. Piss and hell and every other explitive. I got them out of the envelopes, let's hope they make it. Hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo. I still have to return a stray glass and knife from yesterday's lunch tray that didn't make it back on the tray that Amy took back for me. She was being a real sweety.

Yikes. David just called me. Eeewww. That was awkward.

Ok, I'm going to bed with my nice brace on. Playing ice-hockey as Mike put it.

A Little Bit Of Topical Humour

A baby seal walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What'll   ya have?"

The seal says, "Anything but a Canadian club."

It's Never Too Early To Start Your Christmas Shopping

This made me laugh so hard I almost cried.

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They come in various styles, including George Dubya Tush, Parass Hilton, and the one I thought was most creative, Dingleberry Bonds.

They write a good sales pitch too, so good that I almost want to buy one. Hey, I said almost, and who are you to judge anyway?

People say DUBYA's got his head up his butt, now you can find out what it's like to have it up yours! 5 1/4" high and 3" from ear to ear (flared for ultimate anal amusement) GEORGE DUBYA TUSH will have you standing at attention and saluting the flag while he roots around for that pesky WMD (Wildly Messy Defecation)!

You can order DUBYA alone or with the "ASSQUAKE" (vibrating unit).

Get yours now, 'cause he's the divider!<

Seriously, how can you argue with something like that?

Check out the whole, or maybe I should say hole, product line
here.

Carin's Guide Dog Diary: Day 23

Ug. Last week of the program. Gotta make it gotta make it gotta make it!

Breakfast this morning is egg muffins, lunch is egg salad sandwiches or manderin chicken salad...going for the salad. Supper is pork chops or some kind of tuna salad. Dessert is..mmm...cheesecake.

Today's schedule still isn't up yet. I know we're going to this Union Square place, what that is is a mystery. Then we come back and I think we get our pictures. Then we do something we don't know about in the afternoon and they'll probably jam a lecture in at night.

Breakfast was good. Man this knee is annoying. I'll get up and it'll feel good, and then I'll start to move with the dog and ouch,oo, ee!

Well that was a shitty morning. I could only cross one street and a little bit before Adam made me turn around. I went back to the bus and when we came back to school, I couldn't even make it through the obstacle course before I was crying like a child. They made me heel her in and took me straight to the nurse's office, and there was no nurse. In a few minutes, the nurse was at my door, taking me to Urgent Care to have it x-rayed. And then the real fun began. I phoned the 1-800 number for my travel insurance and I had to tell them *everything* that I told them when I bought the goddamn policy. So why did I tell them all this stuff for the goddamn policy? I know, I know, it's to prevent fraud. But everything else that has fraud-prevention asks you two questions and stops. Not these assholes. They want my address, my home phone number, how long I'll be gone for, my date of birth, a phone number where I can be reached in San Rafael, every fucking thing. Ok, my knee hurts, my leg is up on a chair, this is minor compared to the shit that most people have happen to them. Imagine having your head split open and these numbnutses are asking you every detail before they'll cover you. Raar!

So we go over to Urgent Care and they won't even take my travel insurance! What! the! hell!?!?!?! Will not take travel insurance? Is this allowed? They say don't worry about it, we'll just send you the bill and you send it to them. So I may be screwed. What the blue bloody hell?

So they look at me, decide it's ligament and cartilage damage and give me an immobilizer to put over my knee. Great, except the bloody thing won't stay situated and seems to mystify anyone who tries to put it on. It won't stay on the spot! What good is that? I'm alone here because everyone's out on their walks, Helen's gone and I'm going to have to deal with Catherine who can be nice one minute and eat you the next. Great. I can only take this thing off my leg for showers. So I have to see the nurse after each shower. One more thing to remember. Must feed the dog medicine twice a day, must see the nurse after showers, this sucks. God I just want to make it through the last few days of training. If I didn't have that damn thing happen last Tuesday, and if I'd only gone to the nurse immediately, oh if only if only if only! Now I'm paying in spades. Anyone going to guide dog school: if you get an injury, no matter how trivial, go see the damn nurse, or you'll end up like this!

This is horrible. We gave up on the very mobile immobilizer after taping it to my shorts. The key problem with this was the shorts got taped inside, which made it very hard to visit the lady's room. Consequently, I peed all over my shorts because I couldn't get them out of the way. Say goodbye to my dignity. So I went back to the nurse and she said we'll get something that won't give me much support but some is better than none, right...? Not if that brace was any indication. I wanna cry and cry and cry.

I did have something funny happen though. I was trying to get her water, and realized that I couldn't bend to fill her water bowl under the little water tap down at her level. So I picked it up and filled it at the regular tap level. Then I realized that I was going to spill it as I put it back down so I put it down and tried kicking it under the doggy tap and just filling it to an acceptable spot. Eventually I had to let Autumn do it. It was pretty amusing to watch.

So tomorrow morning we're going to get an ace bandage and a less supportive brace, but hopefully it'll do the trick. I cried for about an hour tonight. I don't want to miss all the fun and the fine-tuning. I don't know how the final test that they claim is not a test is going to go if I can't walk a block and a half. Christ, why do I end up cheated all the time? If I'm lucky, this will heal in a couple days, but I doubt it. I only have 5 more days and then I leave here. Damn it I hate this. Ok I'm going to bed. Maybe Lewis Black will make me laugh. I need to have something make me do something other than cry.

Carin's Guide Dog Diary: Day 22

It's Sunday again. Thank God. My knee is crying a lot less today, so that's a good sign. It's still not perfect, but it's a lot better. I forgot to mention that poor Amy hurt something else yesterday. She was relieving Dynamo out in this park area, and he got excited about another dog and made her dislocate her thumb. That woman gets a medal too, she popped it back into place.

Man I swear there's no rest for the wicked. I woke up at 3 in the morning in an absolute panic. I mean it felt like I had questions that were pressing and if I didn't ask them the next day, I'd never get them answered. I've been having this problem where I don't get all of Trixie's poopy presents and they have to scoop up leftovers. this made me panic. Plus I got that stupid worry that I was missing spots on her when I groom. I also haven't tried the flexi lead yet, I haven't tried her in a crate in case I need one and I wanted to be clear on what I should do if some other bozo in a car does the thing he did on Tuesday again. I just suddenly felt this extreme dip in confidence, which set off serious alarm bells in my head because when I left with Babs, I wasn't feeling confident. Then, after going to the bathroom, I could calm myself down enough to go back to sleep by saying these are diferent concerns and I feel pretty safe with her in the street, a lot more sure of myself than I did when I left Ottawa. I told myself to go back to sleep and ask Jessica in the morning. I got some more sleep, and swallowed my pride and asked Jessica all the questions in the morning. I looked like a blubbering fool, she probably thought I was a wacko. Hopefully not. All I could think was "Does this classify me as mentally unstable because I seem to be tearing up over trivial little questions?" But she didn't seem too upset that I was feeling like a dork. She told me she'd rather I ask now than go home with unanswered questions. She told me she'd help me more to make sure I knew how to do speed control with the woofer. I'm getting it, but it's by no means perfect, and I'm going to have to steady her down so I can find doors, etc. It was really weird to have such a wave of panic wash over me. I thought I wouldn't have that since I'd already gone through the Babs stuff, but I guess her flash of panic was over totally different things. I was worried about where I was going to put her food, whether I'd be able to handle it all, all that jazz. This is more about unresolved questions. Funny how no matter how many times you do something, you probably get the same bits of worry. Or maybe that's just a me thing.

So finally Trixie pooped and we could get a sample for the vets. It even looked not as soft. Ok then. Whatever that was.

Man Autumn can sleep through anything. She snores away while Trixie plays with her bone, while Clyde plays the organ, while I write over here.

Today I plan to do laundry, perhaps read the rest of the guide to Sylvia, Jill and Carmen and maybe play a bit on the computer and take Trixie to the paddock. Other than that, sweet dick all. I might get out the Lewis Black book and start reading it. That would force me to lay down.

My knee is weird. If I work it too much, it screams, but after long periods of inactivity, it complains too. Damned if I do, damned if I don't. Right now the pain is a lot less. Please don't let me hurt myself anymore.

Poor Amy. Some power does not want her to get a guide dog, but she persists on without stopping.

It sounds like Bus 1 is getting to be a pretty cool place. I guess Al, the quiet mouse, has started talking about sex, Bernard teases Frank mercilessly and Frank laughs at him, and then there's Amy who just never stops making people laugh. We were laughing the other day because they were talking about dogfoods, and Eukanuba, and Frank called it Nuka-Euba. I looked over at Amy and said, "What has Frank got against Euba's, he wants to nuke a euba?" Then she's laughing and trying not to get caught. So they're always talking about all the new words like snop and anpissitation and now nuka-euba.

Man I was hungry. I had seconds. There have been few times where I've had seconds, but this morning was one of them. I'm tired, I wonder if I can nap.

Ok that was creepy. As I was sleeping, I heard the ladies from dorm services come in and change our towels and garbage, and then we heard a knock and then feet walking slowly and methodically around the room. I called out to the feet, but no one answered. Then they left and Autumn never saw them. Um, how weird. Do we have a ghost?

I forgot to mention we met our first nincompoop while doing guide work. We were doing sidewalkless, which is hard, and some rude asshole yells, "Those dogs must be new, they're not getting it, ha ha ha ha ha!" Ooo! If there's a sure-fire way to make my blood boil, that's it. Idiots.

I should go check on my laundry. Then I just have to run the beast in the grassy paddock, please don't let me step in shit, and then read the other half of the freelance guide to Carmen, Sylvia and Jill. And Carmen's trying to come up with a new line for Frank's new dog. Listen, chicky, the song is now dead.

On a side-note, Frank is all googoo over his new dog. It's really weird to watch.

Raaaar! Trixie is Giardia positive *again!* So now we need a stronger medication to cure it. I think this time, when the medication is done, I'll ask if we can send a sample over to make sure that she's clear. I want this Giardia thing cured before I come home! Let me say it again, raaaar! I'm sure it will resolve, I just wish I wasn't like 6 days from going home still dealing with Giardia.

Now I think I'll bug Sylvia and Carmen about the freelance guide. I feel guilty that I have it in my room. It should be back in its rightful place. I only stole it because I was reading it to them.

I don't know what happened with Henry, he never showed up for lunch.

Ok, checking laundry, it wasn't dry last time, let's hope it is now.

Yea laundry's done, and I ran her in the paddock. We ran until she started chomping on grass. Did I mention I have to give her two medications to zap the Giardia? Ug damn infections.

We ran them in the paddock, now she's snoring. I don't think my trip to the paddock did wonders for my knee though. I forgot about all the uneven spots in the ground. So I kept tripping and on my way back, since I was just heeling her, I slipped off the curb. I didn't fall, just jolted everything, *again*. Hope for the best. I think if I wear the knee brace during workouts, I should be fine. Then I can relax at home.

Dinner tonight is some kind of black bean chili. Lunch was fajitas, and they were good. The dessert was pumpkin pie.

Oh, Craig headed back to Toronto. I hear it's cold there this weekend, the poor soul. God I hope I won't freeze my ass off when I come home next weekend. Just think about this. This time next weekend, which is 8:30 Eastern, I'll be back home. Mom and dad will probably still be with me, helping me out with a few things, but I'll be home, back to my own schedule, back to my own life. I will have survived, and I will have my Trixie-beast at home..and the really hard stuff begins. Keeping her training up, teaching her my home stuff, falling into a nice rhythm.

I'm not looking forward to graduation, I think it'll be heart-wrenching. They take the dog from you, the puppy raiser holds it and hands it over to you. And then the tears will start flowing. If a little girl raised it, some of them are raised by highschool kids and their families, I'll feel like I'm stealing candy from a baby. I know it was all explained to them, but I'll feel like the embodyment of the evil end of puppy raising, where the slave-driver takes the dog away. I hope my beast doesn't misbehave and need correction. I'll feel like such a cruel person.

It's almost time for dinner and I'm not hungry. Arg. I think after dinner I'll read a book. I think this has been the first truly relaxing Sunday I've had. The first Sunday was relaxing but I was still getting onto the rhythm of things and there were more things going on. Last Sunday was just a zoo. This Sunday was very laid back which was good. I just get the distinct sense my knee isn't any better.

Man Autumn's good at catching catnaps. Almost as good as puppies are.

So my evening is going to be slow and easy. Read a book, water the puppy, continue reading, relieve the puppy, read until I fall asleep. Cool? Cool.

Well, I ended up playing with my adorable pile of fun. Then Autumn and I decided we had to practice the airplane seat, which is a good idea, since I'm going to have to wrestle with her when I get on the plane early in the morning on Sunday. Ug. I have to get her on first, get her to lay down, shove her little tushy under the seat in front of me, get in and squiggle her further. Then, I decided I wanted to see what she'd be like in a crate, in case I needed one. Oy. We had to put the collar up so we had more control and practically ram her in there. But I'm sure some kibble and a cong would sweeten the deal. then we put booties on her to see what size would fit best. We're not sure. The medium ones seem too small but the large ones seem too floppy. She says take her to the store to get them. Fine with me. I'm sure she thought I was nuts. Now I'm going to bed. The last insanity awaits.

Carin's Guide Dog Diary: Day 21

It's Saturday. I didn't sleep very well, and apparently neither did my Trixie-poo. Every time I woke up, I'd hear her moving. When I got up, she was cheerful as ever. But after feeding, when I took her out to relieve, she had diarrhea. So they may need to take another poop sample. The poor baby just kept going and going and going. They say it's probably just stress that's doing this to her. Back on the WD we go. Arg. I can't need two foods when I get home. Grrr! They say it's nothing I could have done, but you know me and my worries.

This morning is additional sidewalkless or country roads or a freelance route, or in my case, rest time for my poor knee. Then it's lunch time on GDB's dime. I think we're going to this Chinese food place. Mmm Chinese food. Hope they don't think Trixie is the meal. I'm sorry, that was really really mean. Then this afternoon, if I'm feeling up to it, I'm going to do the bus to lounge. Then I think we're done for the day, phew. Next week is going to be uber insane, so I have to be up for it. Breakfast sounds good, breakfast borito. Mmm. Then lunch will be at the Chinese food place. Then dinner is prime rib or some salad thing. Mmm prime rib. And the dessert is a bit of a mystery, all it says is it's Hawaiian delight. I'll bet it has pineapple in it. Mmm.

It's really freaky that next Saturday it will be time to graduate. I'm at the last week. Then everything will reach a fever pitch. We'll have to pack everything up, know what you are and are not supposed to pack. Then I will fall down and relax.

I heard some evil news yesterday. I heard that it's snowing back home! Steve, say it isn't so! Well actually tell me the truth. I got an email from one of the places where I volunteer that said, "Hey guys, anyone wanna build a snowman?" I almost cried right in the computer room. Nooo! Snooooow!

Damn I'm hungry. I hope I got this leg brace right. It keeps sliding ever so slightly. If I don't have the utmost confidence in it, I'm going to see the nurse to make sure it's good and tight. I think I got it now. Come on, ring the chimes, ring them ring them ring them! I wanna eat eat eat! MmmChinese food! God I'm all over the place today.

Sniffle sniffle. Because I'm staying in, I had to get the nurse to pick me up some lunch so all I'm getting is a turkey sandwich and a pop. I was really looking forward to Chinese food. Sniffle. Oh well, I'll get take-out on another day.

What a weird morning. I went to the computer room and played around for a while, and then I came back here, played with Trixie and laid down for a bit. Poor Trixie doesn't know what's up. She's restless on her tie-down. I wanted to take her to relieve but because of the diarrhea and them needing to get a sample, I didn't want to take her out alone. Erggy. I've finally heard her bark. That was weird. I was sleeping and the nurse brought me the sandwich, and she barked and barked and barked. I told her to be quiet and I had to come over and give her a little correction. Mmm this sandwich doesn't look half bad.

Well that was interesting. I went to relieve her and the relieving door locked behind me! So there I was trying to figure out how I was going to get back in. I eventually got in when the buses came back. How embarrassing. At least it wasn't my fault. The door was supposed to be unlocked. Some dog kept barking. I guess it was one of the instructor's dogs.

They're definitely leaning towards me taking the afternoon off. It's probably a good idea. I think I'll take this restless one to the paddock and let her run run run. She's so restless because we didn't do any workouts.

Apparently I should be glad I missed lunch. Carmen was really rude to the people at the Chinese restaurant and Frank kept trying, and failing, to speak all kinds of Chinese dialects. Oh Frank.

So I'm going to go to the 1:30 meeting and then take her to the paddock so she can get some energy out. My knee feels well enough to get her to the paddock but I'm glad I'm not doing routes.

Oh boy. They're getting Frank to switch dogs. What the hell? It's not the dog's fault that Frank can't do it, it's Frank's fault. Maybe they're just covering their ass, trying this one last thing, and then that's it. Poor Frank.

I still haven't run her in the paddock because I was worried they'd lock me out again. Now I'm worried that it's too close to relieving time and she'll leave a present in the paddock. I think I'll relieve her after doggy grub time, then I'll take her to the paddock. I think I've got it. Let's hope so. Oh I also wanted an instructor to look at one of her toenails. It's got a bit of a hangnail and I don't want her to chew it off and make it infected. I finally caught where she gnaws on her nails and I see why now.

Well, I guess she chewed off the hang naily thing, because when I asked about it, it was gone. When she finally pooped, it was too late to take a sample. Arg Trix. Just poop in the morning.

Man, we're droppin' like flies! Jill severely bruised her foot. It seemed like it was broken by the way she fell, and she's now wheeling around in a wheelchair because she has to stay off it. And poor Sylvia fell in the paddock the other day. Is it normal to have so many classmates get wounded, or are we just a bunch of fragile wimps?

Frank got his new dog, Meg. He's acting really weird about the change of dogs. He's talking like the PR person or someone's lawyer talks to reporters, saying things like "I have no comment, I have no comment." He kept saying "What happens to Anton is up to the school to decide. He just didn't suit as a guide dog. I must now focus on my new dog." I wonder if this is their last attempt to help Frank, and if this doesn't work out, bye-bye Frank. I don't know. He doesn't seem to be doing very well. Everyone's wondering how he's going to cope.

Autumn and I took our woofers into the paddock, we heard Beauty's menacing bark, and Autumn got her foot plastered in poop. She was so mad and so disgusted. It was hillarious.

All that's left is relieving, then we all get a day off. I plan to do laundry and not much else. Laundry and all things doggy, and rest my leg. I'll take her to the grassy paddock again, make up for the times I didn't this week. But now that I think about it, I took her Monday, then Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday my knee hurt so that makes me feel less guilty about it.

Carin's Guide Dog Diary: Day 20

Man I can tell I'm getting tired. I'm getting up later and later, showering at different times, all that jazz. I collapsed into bed, but I didn't sleep too well. I tried to elevate my leg by putting it on my extra blanket and pillow, but I guess I didn't lie too still when I slept. So I'd wake up and it was no longer elevated. Apparently I'm limping pretty badly, so badly that Amy can see it. That's impressive. And the scariest part of that is I'm limping that badly when I'm just walking without the dog. I don't think this ice thing is working. It hurts when I put it on. I wonder if heat would have been better.

Today we do a lot of sidewalkless travel, so places where there's no sidewalk. Then we have lunch, almond chicken something or taco salad and dinner is shrimp and sausage gumbo. Mmm. Dessert is Strawberry pie. Mmm. Then this afternoon after lunch, Bus 1 gets their vet consultations and Carmen, Sylvia and I are going to get lost, er, go to the gift shop and get our stuff ordered. Then we all relieve and head out for sidewalkless.

Man, things are coming apart at the seams. Amy and Jill don't seem to be getting along, there are few people that Amy would want to keep in touch with, and Frank is getting lost more and more. He was down by my room looking for the library. My room is nowhere near the library. He must be stellor on street corners because he sure has trouble inside. Al says, "I'm ready to get home!" and he's got tons of patience.

I had to get rescued this morning. I went into the exercise room, got an ice pack, and then Lee came into the room and shut a door. Suddenly feeling a wee bit panicked, thinking she'd shut the exercise room door, I went for the nearest exit, but that wasn't where I came in from. There's this problem where retrains smack into us with their dogs, so I was just desperately trying to avoid dogs and got all disoriented. Eventually, Clyde, the sweet organ-player that he is, set me back on the right track. Weirdness there.

This morning they jacked with the obstacle course. They put in an overhead clearance, or something you could bonk your head off of. Here, it's a bunch of foam rods that don't hurt and make a lot of noise. So if the dog shows it to you, you say good girl and tap it and then say forward and duck under it. So now I'm going to have to stick my probe foot, the left foot, out, and stick my hand out and look around, all the while hoping my woofer isn't just up to no good. Then, after a long delay when Frank wasn't there, we headed out to do country roads. Their technique was stay on the left side of a country road because traffic is more likely to see you on the left. To see if you're drifting, halt and make a left turn and check your edge. When a car comes down the road, you do the same so you're out of the way. I made it with minimal pain in the knee, even though my damn knee still hurts and I have to steady steady steady her down. She was real sniffy, and the slower she is, the sniffier she gets. Erg. Heal, you stupid knee.

We'll get our pictures soon! Heehee! Pictures via email, here we come. Hopefully I'll be able to get one uploaded to the blog. Heehee, Trixie, you'll be famous. Ok the chimes are insistently ringing.

Lunch was good, and the pie was awesome. Then Carmen, Sylvia and I went over to the gift shop and that was pure chaos. Too many dogs, dogs and people and no room to move and poor lighting so whatever vision some people had was useless. It took forever to get our orders, but it's done and I have my stuff bought, complete with Italian charm for my bracelet.

God my room is a mess. Stuff is just wherever I set it. Nothing really has a home. My knee hurts like a son of a bitch but I don't know what to do about it. Part of me says go see Katherine, but part of me thinks she won't be able to do anything for me, that what I really need is rest, which I can't have. They say I can have the morning off tomorrow, which will come in handy. Then tomorrow afternoon is another bus to lounge. After that, I think I can fall down until Monday pretty much aside from doing laundry.

I'm so exhausted. I want to take Trixie to the paddock, but my knee hurts and just the idea of trying to keep her steady and get to the paddock and back is just too much. Plus she's conked out on her tiedown. I feel like such a gimp. It's making me worry that I won't be able to hack the last week of training if this knee doesn't get better. I don't know how Amy hacked it with her gimpy ankle. Gotta get through tomorrow. Then I can keal. Just tomorrow afternoon. I'm skipping the morning. I feel sick. Please don't let this develop into anything bad. Oh please oh please oh please.

I'm officially a limpy gimpy. They gave me a knee brace. I'm taking tomorrow off, or at least tomorrow morning. Probably the whole day. If I don't, I might be going home a cripple. I don't know if I'll make it to the computer tonight, have to take it easy.

Carin's Guide Dog Diary: Day 19

Here I am, sitting here with my leg up with ice on my stupid knee. I've stripped my bed because it's Thursday and that's what you do on Thursdays. This morning we go to the busiest part of San Francisco and they try and get us killed, er, test our dogs around subway platforms. This afternoon is freelancing and some people are telling me I shouldn't go, but I've only done 1 real freelance so far, 2 if you count the morning trip to the coffee shop. I skipped yesterday afternoon's freelance, I feel like I should earn another skip. God damn it I forgot to brush her teeth last night. with all this icing and crap I forgot to do it. Alrighty, I should go to breakfast.

Breakfast was good. Then we went to San Francisco and were in the financial district. I forgot to mention that a bit after David left, Jen called me into the office. I was very scared, but the reason she wanted me to come into the office was because she needs to videotape a session with a student to get her license officially. So today we got videotaped. Little goofhead decided to misbehave. I put the gental leader on her and she was trying to rub it off. But the rest of the walk went ok except she screwed up a couple crossings and we had to rework them. It's really terrifying when you're in the street and the instructor yells stop! Oh my god!

My knee still hurts and the sudden jerks that come with doggy-movement don't help. I got her steadied down to a decent speed, but when we're in the relieving circle and she starts jerking around in circles, oh my god the pain! I'm icing it whenever I can, but ouch ooch eech ouch! Plus it's worse whenever I've been on the bus for a while.

So in the morning we rode the MUNI whatever that stands for...it's like a subway. They made me do this thing where the platform was off to the left and I told her to go left and see what she'd do. She turned me 180, but certainly not left. This is because they're trained to not let you go near the platform when a train is not there.

This afternoon was a freelance route. Because the meatloaf didn't sound good to a couple people, we decided to go to this pizza joint. It went pretty well, actually it's been the best route so far. I took a long time to get there because of my stupid knee, but oh well. Darcy, one of the retrain instructors, pretended to be a stranger who wanted to pet Trixie. I think I passed the test though.

I had the funniest conversation with a stranger at a corner. She's trying to tell me the light is green and asking if I want help. I said no, I knew it was green, thank you. She asked me, as we were crossing the street, "How do you know the light is green?" So I'm explaining traffic and all that stuff as we're crossing the street. O and M on the fly.

So I get back and my knee hurts and I have to make the bed, etc. but now that's done. I'm just going to water her, clean her big dish and check my email, I think I'll leave her on tiedown for that just to give my knee a rest. Oh, I also have to ice my knee and read the other half of the freelance guide. Yea nothing going on this evening.

Oh, Redboy Pizza is friggin' expensive. 4 bucks a slice! Ouch! And I heard from the technology lady. She's passing my resume onto Human Resources. Hope for me!

Good Point

Q. How many Gay Rights Activists does it take to change a light bulb?

A. None.  a bulb shouldn't have to change.  Society should accept it as it is.

Carin's Guide Dog Diary: Day 18

That was an interesting evening. It wasn't the guy from 9/11 there, so I didn't go. Jen helped me with my gift shop order form and I got to tell her what I thought of this whole gift shop setup and how mad I was that the lady asked me what the person would look like. Hello? Blind! So then I asked to talk to Jen about the gift shop and how to get there to drop off the form. She took me into the library to look at the map. Now, keep in mind that this map is tall and I am not, so to see the whole thing I had to stand on a chair and this map is on the wall, so to the casual observer, it looks like I'm molesting the wall. Then Jen helped us find the braille freelance guide. It wasn't in the library, it was in the Day room. So I swiped it and took it to Carmen and Sylvia's room and Carmen, Sylvia, Jill, Amy and I sat down to read it because neither Carmen nor Sylvia nor Jill were braille readers and they weren't computer literate. I still have it and I'm going to read more to them on the bus as we drive to San Francisco this morning. Yep, we're going to Chestnut Street and taking city buses. Then this afternoon we do freelancing and somehow bus 2 which is my bus gets vet consultation. Oh, speaking of vet consultations, I found a mark on Trixie's nose and asked about it and Jen went click click click and found the mark in her medical file and said it was some kind of pimple and it's resolved. I asked about the lip-chewing and she said no worries, it's all good, that's just the way her lip rests. So anyway after the afternoon of chaos, we get to have *another* route, a night route. Eekers. We're going to be exhausted. And I realized that with all the chaos that happened yesterday, I left my flash-reader and card in the lounge. Oh, Autumn and I talked things out and I think things are good now, I said I sure didn't mean to say that she didn't need to be here. I think we're good now. We'll see.

Oh yeah, Autumn made up a new word, anpissitate. One day she tried to say anticipate and that came out, so we started joking that anpissitating was when the dogs thought it was time to relieve. Snopping and anpissitating. Alrighty then.

I guess Dynamo's not doing as well as we thought. He's still having a hard time. And I get the sense that some people are having trouble or reservations about reporting how they're feeling because they're afraid they'll get kicked out. That's apparently why Meredeth walked back to the bus, because she was afraid they'd kick her out. I feel ill that people actually feel this way. They certainly don't make me feel this way. Ok breakfast time.

Breakfast was funny. Craig asked for hot, hot, hot, hot coffee like he always does because he doesn't like the coffee on the table. We were teasing him and said he'd better be careful or they'd put a little extra in his food, but Frank misunderstood me and thought I said they'll put a little electrode in and then started talking about inhibiting thoughts in the frontal lobe or something, and we laughed and laughed and laughed. Then Craig asked Nita, one of the ladies who serves food, what he should say to a philipino girl to make her all warm and happy and Nita said, "Philipinas are nice. They'll take care of you, clean for you, cook for you, but if you're not nice to them, they'll kick your butt." We all just laughed and laughed and laughed.

Then we went to San Francisco and walked around Chestnut Street and she weaved and deaked me through all kinds of things, and tried to sniff a lot of stuff. I almost put the gental leader on her.

My knee really hurts today,I think I may visit the nurse...just ran after Trixie because she decided it would be a fine idea to chase down some chihuahuas. But she came to me. She's a sweetheart.

I'm sad, but it had to happen. I went to the nurses and told them what happened and they told me I had to take the afternoon off to ice my knee. They even wanted me to reschedule the vet consultation, but I went anyway. I found out why she licks her belly. She had a couple skin infections. I got the official word that those little bumps around some of her other nipples are pseudo-nipples. She had a couple ear infections, a couple runny eye thingies going on, I think that was about it. So now I'm sitting here with my knee elevated, sad because I want to be out there, but whenever we have sudden stops and starts, I start to limp, so that's no good. Stupid knee. This is really annoying because this was when things were getting really intense. And I was gonna go to Coldstone this afternoon god damn it! I read the whole freelance guide. Now I just have to decide what places I want to visit. God it sucks being out of commission, but they really want me to ice it. Should groom puppy.

That was a little scary. We heard that Sylvia got hoofed to the Urgent Care clinic because her blood pressure skyrocketed. We were afraid she'd get kicked out of the class, but they just gave her some blood pressure medication and that was the end of it. I know there's fear that you'll get hoofed, but this is just so weird. The nurse wanted me to go back for more ibuprofen but she appears to be nowhere to be found. She's probably still with Sylvia.

Night route over. It went pretty well. Trixie-doodles did perfectly. I screwed up a little, but nothing huge. My knee was not pleased with me that I did the night route. Please stop hurting damn it! Please please please! I have to take the ice pack back to the exercise room. When will I have time to ice it tomorrow? Let's plan this out. I wake up, shower and do all the jazz with the puppy. quarter to 7 I could ice it until 7. Then I could take it off, go to breakfast, come back and re-ice it until 8. Then screw icing until whenever we get back from San Fran. I could ice it again when I get back from afternoon goodness. I have to have it 15 minutes on, 45 minutes off. Catherine is a scary nurse. I can't tell if she's mad or patient half the time. She was so cross with me when I came in with the screwed up knee.

I got my flash reader back. Woopsers for leaving it there but glad I got it back. Going to bed now.