Help Solona. Bernard Can't do It Alona!

Yesterday, I was going to use Solona to solve a captcha, but I saw that no operators were standing by. So I was cruising around the site and started reading blog entries and came across this one. The poor fellow has realized that he cannot keep up the inhuman hours he's been doing because a. it's not healthy and b. groggy minds do not good captcha-solvers make. I'm glad he's realized this, because I was seeing the insane hours he was keeping, and I was worried they might drive him over the edge. No human should work that long.

He has been asking for more operators, but hasn't really had any luck. He especially needs operators spread across different timezones, so while we're sleeping, Australians can get their captchas solved and vice versa.

I wish I could help him out, but of course the operators need to have functioning eyeballs, so...that eliminates me.

It sounds like you determine when you're available to solve captchas, and the site doesn't bug you if you say you're not available. It's a pretty easy job for someone who's already working at a computer, and just has to click over, solve the captcha, and go back to doing whatever they're doing.

If you're interested in helping out, you can read his volunteer document, and if it sounds like something you'd be willing to do, email Bernard and let him know. The training is one-on-one and I'm sure wouldn't be too difficult.

I hope some people decide to help out. It's always good to have other captcha-solving tools available in case one is having issues. But this one won't work unless it has lots of humans behind it to drive it. Can you help to drive it?

Red Hot Fools

I think all of these people should stay in school for longer hours. they're obviously not getting basic things like physics and logic.

Because their friend was eyeing up the giant chili pepper bolted to the roof of a Chili's restaurant, they thought they'd get it for him. Yup, they thought they would use a hacksaw and a drill to free it, and load it into their SUV. You can guess that didn't work so well.

Let's first find out how they plugged in a power drill. They strung 470 feet of extension cord across 4 lanes of a busy road to an outlet in a Home Depot parking lot. Amazingly, their cord didn't get shredded by cars and they didn't get smucked plugging it in.

They did manage to get the bolts drilled off while the alarm was going off. How did they think they were going to transfer the giant chili from roof to SUV? I have no idea. Police arrived and found one person on the roof, 2 hiding in bushes and another running away. They got 'em all. I think if they didn't show up when they did, they would have been scooping up 4 crushed dumbasses.

And all of this because their friend had his eye on the chili. what was he going to do with it *if* they got it to him?

And this was a plan they hatched on the spur of the moment. That may be their only saving grace. If they had planned this for a long time, then they would be really, really stupid instead of just really stupid.

One Screen, Two Screen, Dead Screen, Blue Screen

this must be internet day or something. I got this in the email a couple of days ago but didn't feel like putting it up. Now I do.

Dr. Seuss - WHY DOES MY COMPUTER CRASH?

If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port,
and the bus is interrupted as a very last resort,
and the access of the memory makes your floppy disk abort,
then the socket packet pocket has an error to report.

If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash
and the double clicking icon puts your window in the trash
and your data is corrupted 'cause the index doesn't hash,
then your situation's hopeless and your system's gonna crash!

If the label on the cable on the table at your house
says the network is connected to the button on your mouse,
but your packets want to tunnel to another protocol,
that's repeatedly rejected by the printer down the hall,
and your screen is all distorted by the side effects of gauss,
so your icons in the window are as wavy as a souse;
then you may as well reboot and go out with a bang,
cuz sure as I'm a poet, the sucker's gonna hang!

When the copy of your floppy's getting sloppy in the disk
and the micro code instructions cause unnecessary risk,
then you'll have to flash the memory
and you'll want to RAM your ROM.
Quickly turn off the computer
and be sure to tell your Mom!

Yeah, it was lame, but I'm feeling lame today. blame it on the cold I have.

Summary of My Last Year On The Computer

In the same email as the last one, Jen sent me this one too. It made me chuckle, so up it went.

Summary of My Last Year on The Computer

I must send my thanks to whoever sent me the one about poop in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet towel with every envelope that needs sealing.

Also, now I have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.

I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl (Penny Brown) who is about to die in the hospital for the 1,387,258th time.

I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Bill Gates/Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special e-mail program.

I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out for me, and St. Theresa's novena has granted my every wish.

I no longer eat KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers.

I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day

Thanks to you, I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward an email to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.

Because of your concern I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.

I no longer can buy gasoline without taking someone along to watch the car so a serial killer won't crawl in my back seat when I'm pumping gas.

I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr. Pepper since the people who make these products are atheists who refuse to put 'Under God' on their cans.

I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.

And thanks for letting me know I can't boil a cup of water in the microwave anymore because it will blow up in my face...disfiguring me for life.

I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.

I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.

I no longer receive packages from UPS or FedEx since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.

I no longer shop at Target since they are French and don't support our American troops or the Salvation Army.

I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica , Uganda, Singapore , and Uzbekistan

I no longer buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus since I now have their recipe.

Thanks to you, I can't use anyone's toilet but mine because a big brown African spider is lurking under the seat to cause me instant death when it bites my rear end.

And thanks to your great advice, I can't ever pick up the $5 bill dropped in the parking lot because it probably was placed there by a sex molester waiting underneath my car to grab my leg.

I can no longer drive my car because I can't buy gas from certain gas companies!

If you don't send this e-mail to at least 4,000 people in the next 7 minutes, a large dove with diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00 PM this afternoon and the fleas from many camels will infest your back, causing you to grow a hairy hump. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my cousin's, wife's, uncle's, next door neighbor's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's beautician who lives in the southern part of Mississippi...

Have a wonderful day....

Oh, by the way.....

A South American scientist from Argentina, after a lengthy study, has discovered that people with insufficient brain activity read their e-mail with their hand on the mouse.

Don't bother taking it off now, it's too late.

now, forward this to all your friends.. Hehehe.

I guess I'm smart. I don't put my hand on the mouse. But maybe I would put it there if I could use the thing.

The Forwarder's 12 Step Program

Jen sent me this, and I figured the more people read it, the better.

The "Forwarder's" 12 Step Program

Sometimes friends have to tell you things you might not like to hear, but need to. Everyone say it with me...

I will NOT get bad luck, lose my friends, or lose my mailing lists if I DON'T forward an e-mail!

I will NOT hear any music or see a taco dog, if I do forward an e-mail.

Bill Gates is NOT going to send me money. Victoria Secret doesn't know anything about a gift certificate they're supposed to send me.

Ford will NOT give me a 50% discount even if I forward my e-mail to more than 50 people!

I will NEVER receive gift certificates, coupons, or freebies from Coca Cola, Cracker Barrel, Old Navy, or anyone else if I send an e-mail to 10 people.

I will NEVER see a pop-up window if I forward an e-mail! (If you do, you have a virus or trojan.)

There is NO SUCH THING as an e-mail tracking program and I am not STUPID enough to think that someone will send me $100 for forwarding an e-mail to 10 or more people!

There is NO kid with cancer through the Make-a-Wish program in England collecting anything! He did when he was 7 years old. He is now cancer free and 35 years old and DOESN'T WANT ANY MORE POST CARDS, or GET-WELL CARDS!

The government does not have a bill in Congress called 901B (or whatever they named it this week) that, if passed, will enable them to charge us 5 cents for every e-mail we send.

There will be NO cool dancing, singing, waving, colorful flowers, characters, or program that I will receive immediately after I forward an e-mail. NONE, ZIP, ZERO, NADA!!

The American Red Cross will NOT donate 50 cents to certain individuals dying of some never-heard-of disease for every e-mail address I send this to. The American Red Cross RECEIVES donations.

And finally, I WILL NOT let others guilt me into forwarding an email by telling me if I don't I am not their friend or that I'm a bad person.

Now, repeat this to yourself until you have it memorized, and send it along to at least 5 of your friends before the next full moon or you will gain twenty pounds in the next three months! (No, not really! If you believe that last statement, go back and read this message again!)

got it? Good.

I Think Dogs Have More Biological Knowledge Than Ugandan Reporters

I know that Ugandan culture is a very different thing than here, but it's still weird to see it demonstrated in a news article like this one about Nathan Awoloi. The story is that he forced his wife to breastfeed puppies when their mother died. Now his wife is having seizures and their human baby died of something that seems like rabies, so probably mommy dearest likely has rabies. But since a doctor couldn't find bite marks on her breasts, they've decided she couldn't have been forced to do this, so she must be sick in the head. Hello, pups don't have teeth when they're really young! they don't chew on the nipples of their own mothers. Duh! And where else do you think the baby could have gotten rabies? So now they can't charge him with what he did to her, only with what happened to the baby.

Even more disturbing than that is that they don't seem to care about the woman's well-being, and this thing that I think passes for an editorial seems to argue what he did was ok because he had given cows to her parents as part of a bride price, or at least he thinks the guy might have logically thought it was ok because of this. Yes, I know that still goes on there, and women are not considered equals, but it's weird to see it written in a news article.

And finally, the author of this editorial thing seems to earnestly believe that a human and a dog can create offspring. Sir/madam, as I'm not sure which you are, they can't. I'm pretty sure that's biologically impossible. S/he also seems to not know why dogs' teats don't bleed after nursing, as if s/he doesn't know that puppies aren't born with teeth. Good lord. Even if you're not scientifically advanced and/or knowledgeable, wouldn't you have enough power of observation to notice that puppies don't start out with teeth?

Wow. I'm just amazed. I shouldn't be, but I am.

Rat Bastards!

I love Snopes. Just when I think I have no ideas for posts, something floats my way from there. Just such a thing is this legend about rats. One of the things it says is this:

Speaking of predictions of harm befalling particular individuals, rats gnawing on one's clothes or chewing on furniture, especially bedroom furniture, is an omen of death.

I can feel the hair raising up on my arms. Let me explain why.

Years ago, I kept a pet rat. I called her Hope because she was the rat we used in our operant conditioning lab in psych and after our first rat was so traumatized by her life for whatever reason that she hated us and would not respond to us at all, this one was our only hope for a good mark. After the time at the lab was over, if we didn't take her as a pet, she would have been euthenized. I would not allow this, and even found our crazy rat a home for a while, although they had to give her away because she was too aggressive. I don't know where she went. Let's hope it was somewhere ok. Anyway, back to my rat.

One day I think it was late in 2002, I opened her cage to let her walk around on the top of the dresser like she liked to do. She was not a fan of being held. I don't know what was done to these rats leading up to when we got them, but when I would pick her up, she would promptly shit herself and scream. so, I learned to get her to go where I wanted by waving my hands in various directions, and I just sort of let her walk where she wanted on her own and just made sure there was nothing she could get into. I figured I didn't want to do anything to her that made her any more afraid than she already was. But this night I made a bad, bad mistake. I forgot that my underwear drawer was a bit open.

So she was playing away, and suddenly I couldn't hear her anymore. I looked everywhere. I could not figure out where she went. I searched and searched. Once I noticed the open drawer, I searched it but she was not there. I set up an elaborate ramp deal made of serving trays that led to a bucket containing a cornucopia of her favourite fruits and veggies in the hopes that she would climb it and start munching and I'd find her and get her back home. I told my super that my rat had escaped, so if another apartment dweller complained of a rat, if it was a hooded rat with a little pink nose, for the love of Pete don't call the exterminator. He gagged and tried to keep his composure, and without saying it, made it abundantly clear that he could make no promises that my rat would not be a dead rat if I didn't find her. I should have known this from the day that our room-mate mistakenly thought a bird was in his room and it was a dying talking watch, but that's another story.

then, shamefully, a day later I thought about how she might have been able to slide down the back of that drawer into the next drawer. It took me a whole day to come to this revelation. And I ridicule people for being stupid. I stuck my hand down and found whiskers! The poor beast! With a wrench and a heave, that underwear drawer came free and my poor Hope was freed. She must have been horribly dehydrated and hungry! I think about how long she spent in there. Oh that poor little thing!

then I looked at my clothes in that drawer. Not one thing escaped getting hope-marks on it. I was sad, but they were always reminders of what she went through. that was the end of 2002.

then 2003 came, a year of what seemed like unprecedented death, including our room-mate's brother's suicide and the death of Hope herself. Matt, wanna tell the story of what you woke up to one Saturday morning when you stayed with us? Yeah, me carrying a dead rat out past you to the dumpster. this didn't seem to disturb you, you just made sick jokes about it all day, you jerkface.

I don't like to be one who falls into superstition, but I do catch myself doing it sometimes despite everything I know. This is one of those times. It's probably nothing, but it gives me the shivers. the logical part of me thinks I'm full of crap, because as I think about it, the drawer incident may have happened in the summer. Maybe Steve can jog my memory, as I doubt he can forget the bucket of peaches. Yes, there were peaches in there, so it had to have been the summer. But then again, back then we didn't visit the fresh fruit stands, so they may have been peaches that we just decided to buy because we thought "mmm, peaches." So maybe the deaths didn't start so soon...but then again...Steve did have a couple of deaths in his family that summer. Oh god I've got the goose bumps again.

Even so, that doesn't explain the deaths this year, unless someone has a pet rat munching on their clothes somewhere. Holy mother there have been a lot of people keeling over. Mother Nature can stop trying to shake us off at any time, thank you very much.

Yummy Yummy Yummy I've Got Thongs In My Tummy?

Church Kids Raid Panty's For Foodbank Supplies

Car Or No Car, No Way I'm Leaving My Kid Alone In This Town

I realize this is a story about the trial of yet another fool who left his kid in a sweltering car while he fucked off to do some stupid thing or other, but there's still something totally wrong with the headlineSeven testify toddler looked hot.

Part Of this complete Blech-Fest

God damn it, this post should be easy to write. It's ready-made, just like what I'm about to describe. But I'm having a hard time getting started because of my uncontrollable urge to go blech! Ok, I think the heaving is under wraps.

So...if you're a fan of the pre-boiled egg, why not crack open a can of bacon? Mmm mmm good. Don't ya want to after reading the following description?

And Tac Bac - Tactical Canned Bacon is the very best canned bacon we've ever tasted. Not mushed up like dog food, this bacon is in actual strips - blessed with the magic of preservatives to last over 10 years in the can. Sure, you have to refrigerate after opening, but we bet you'll eat it all too quick to worry about that. Tac Bac - Tactical Canned Bacon - the zenith of canned bacon!

Well at least it doesn't taste gross like the whole chicken in a can apparently does.

Hey, why not make your breakfast completely worthy of blech by having some pancakes made from sprayed pancake batter and coffee out of a self-heating can? Eek.

Craig's Forgery

So here's a scary thought. Apparently, if you live in Texas, and your neighbours post an ad on Craigslist falsely saying stuff in your yard is available for the taking, there's nothing they can be charged with because technology kind of snuck up on them. Uh-huh. Right. Sure. What is the difference between falsely claiming something's available on Craigslist and putting an ad in the paper with the same information? What would you charge them with in that case? Just apply it in this one. Come on. With the charges they heaped on in the Lori Drew case, you're telling me they couldn't find something to stick him with? Granted her case was overturned, but at least give it a try, Mr. District Attorney guy.

I have two theories. Either they went easy on the Craigslist-posting neighbour because he's a cop, or we have someone who just can't get past the fact that the crime has an element of it that was committed over the series of tubes, or a little bit of each. I feel horrible for that family. I wouldn't feel safe in my neighbourhood anymore. And I'm thankful the cop was so stupid he used his own email address so they could at least find out who did it. I hope that at the very least, he becomes an ex-cop. But I think he needs to go bunk with a few guys he'd put away. That would be much better.

Taste TheOne That's Forever Frog

Remember that guy who found a dead thing in his pepsi can? He thought it was a mouse. Actually, the FDA took the can, analyzed it, and said it's afrog. It was a partially-decomposed frog, but a frog nonetheless.

And now Pepsi is screaming that it could not have possibly come from their plant. I don't know how it got there, but it couldn't come out the hole, so it's not likely the couple put it in there. And it was partially decomposed. I doubt they keep decomposing frog bodies around for just such an occasion.

Eeewww. I have no other words.

Beatdown In Aisle Five

I think that deep down there's a little bit ofRoger Stephensin all of us, but unlike 61-year-old Wal-Mart patronizing Georgians named Roger Stephens who have court appearances scheduled to take care of some pesky felony charges of cruelty to children, most of us understand that keeping that bit of us inside is a good idea and never end up actually giving the annoying screaming kid five in the eye.

A police report said the man, Roger Stephens, 61, of Stone Mountain, had warned the child’s mother, Sonya Mathews, that if she didn’t quiet down the child, he would do it for her.

According to the report, after the mother failed to quiet the girl, Stephens came up to them and slapped the child several times in the face.

The report then quotes Stephens as saying, “See, I told you I would shut her up.”

Mathews then screamed at Stephens and called for security, the report said. Stephens was stopped by another shopper, according to the report.

The girl was not injured in the incident, but hopefully she learned a little something.

Thumbs Down!

Here's another reason to avoid Bank of America like the plague. they already, from what I can remember, had an on-screen keyboard to be used to enter your password for online banking. I know it was a fraud-prevention measure, but it was also a denial of access measure for anyone who couldn't use a mouse. Now, if you're a non-B of A customer, you have to put a thumb-print on any cheque you wish to cash there. What if you don't have thumbs because you were born with no arms? Uh, um, open an account? Bring your wife over who does have an account? No, all that photo ID is not good enough.

I do give the teller credit for immediatley realizing this whole thumb-print thing was a no-go. It's just too bad the manager epically failed.

This is another reason why all the stuff based on eyes or fingerprints is not a good idea. You would think *everybody* had eyes that can focus or fingerprints, but some of us are blind and some of us don't have arms. It's not any better than photo ID, in fact it's worse. We all have something that passes for a face.

Take Another Stab At It, Or I'll Take A Stab At You

the story of a dad holding a knife to his daughter's cheek until it bled because he was mad at her for not getting her homework done called to me for three reasons. first, there is the obvious one. what kind of dad are you that you would do that? You hit her in the arm, then you made her head hit a cabinet and then you held a knife to her cheek until it bled. You have some serious anger problems to deal with. Get some help.

Second, the wording of the headline killed me. The whole story has significantly changed now, but it said something to the effect of "dad holds knife to daughter's cheek over problems with homework." It was like if the kid had gone and wet the bed, now that would be a good reason. Is there ever a good reason to holda knife to your kid's cheek? The only one I can see is if they were holding a knife to your face, but that's a stretch.

And I find it ironic that after he did what he did, she was kept from school until the cuts and bruises healed. So now, she can have more homework...and the cycle continues. Way to go, Pops.

Give Me Everything In The Register And Nothing Out Of the Barrel

If you're the type of guy who holds knives to the throats of store employees and threatens to kill them while you rob their businesses of cigarettes and cash for a living, it's likely a stretch to say the least for a reasonable person to believe that you have emotions. but22-year-old Scott Thomas Zeilinskiwould like you to know that he has some, and that getting shot while he's just going about his business makes him sad, thank you very much. And just how much does it sadden him? Well, according to the lawsuit he's filed, he is saddened to the tune of $125,000, possibly more.

Zeilinski, who we should perhaps start calling Muffin from this point on, says that not only did getting shot in the arm and back hurt him on the inside, but that it also caused him significant physical distress. I'm sure that after reading his story, the line to cause him a little more is already forming at a pretty good clip.

I have no more words for this...man(?), so I will now do some community service (a concept with which Muffin here is doubtless familiar) and do some find and replace re-wording of this newspaper article since it's all wrong. I'll leave in the mistakes and put the corrections in italics.

CLINTON TOWNSHIP, Mich. - The criminal is finding new and legal ways in itself a crime to victimize the people he ripped off and threatened to kill.

"Ridiculous," says a loyal and longtime customer of Nick's Short Stop Party Store regarding 22-year-old Scott Thomas Zeilinski Muffin Snowflake McSadpants' decision to sue the store owner and some of the clerks after he, Zeilinski McSadpants, was shot during an armed robbery.

Zeilinski McSadpants, a name that won't do him any favours other than to educate him on why it's called the pokey is serving an 8-22 year sentence for the robbery that happened in November of 2007.

According to police and court records, Zeilinski McSadpants came in wearing a mask and carrying a knife that he put to the throats of several employees, threatening to kill them before stealing cigarettes and cash. As he was leaving--reportedly still making threats--one of the young clerks grabbed a gun and shot him in the arm and back not hitting him in the spine for obvious reasons. Zeilinski's lawyer McSadpants' say anything no matter how stupid for a dollar ambulance chaser says his client baby is asking in excess of $125,000 for pain and suffering for not liking getting what he deserved and emotional distress for having his poow wittle feewings huwt.

Since the robbery the store owner has spent thousands of dollars money that should be coming out of Muffin's ass, where as mentioned a lot of things will be coming into and out of over the next couple decades on security to keep his employees safe. He says he is hoping nothing like this ever happens again.

Zelinski McSadpants says the incident "ruined his life" no way he didn't beat it to it and believes the store is responsible for it because he is a fool.

There, that looks a lot better.

GDB And Vet Forms

Here's a little heads-up to all GDB grads out there. I've heard from Grad Services that GDB will no longer be mailing out those annual vet forms. Don't get the wrong idea. They will still cover the annual checkups and they will help you with other stuff if you need it, although everything over and above the annual checkup needs preauthorization now. they're just I guess trying to save money where they can. So if you got a big packet o papers, those are the last forms you're going to receive in the mail, so don't heave them.

If you need more forms, you can download the Vet Reimbursement form and annual wellness forms, although I can't seem to link to a generic wellness form. Hell, have a look over the updates to the Veterinary Financial Assistance Program since it has been overhalled and there are links to all the forms there.

Most importantly, do not forget to take your dog to the vet for the annual physical just because the form doesn't come in the mail! find another way to give yourself that nudge if that's what you need. There are a zillion reminder services out there. Use one. Hell, maybe your own vet can send you the email reminder or phone call or some such. I would prefer that GDB send an email reminder, but if they don't do that, they don't do that. Sparky shouldn't suffer because you forget.

Just thought I'd put that out there for anyone who reads here and got their woof from GDB.

Google's Audio Captcha Is Half Broken

I've noticed this a few times in the last few days and wondered if anyone else has.

So Google has their word verification scheme thingamabobber. They also have an audio link. Sometimes the graphic includes numbers, sometimes it includes letters. When the graphic includes letters, the audio link doesn't work. If it is numbers, the audio link works just fine.

Thankfully I have other ways to deal with this, but not everybody does. Has anybody else noticed that pattern? Does anyone know how to contact the good folks in Google's Word Verf department?

In the meantime, thank you once again Solona and WebVisum. You rock my world and make me less likely to hit things and scream.

Goodbye, Old Comet

Ok, it's time. This old house is finally getting the rest of that upgrade we've been talking about. We'll have a whole new layout pretty soon which is going to be great and hopefully allow us to do a lot of things a lot more easily than we can right now. You might notice some odd site behaviour between now and whenever this is done, but don't worry, it's just the Fairies and Elves division of Vomit Comet World HQ working their magic. We'll be back to normal or whatever passes for normal around here pretty soon, so thanks for sticking with us in the meantime. Lord knows why you would do such a thing, but thank you all very much for your poor decision making.

Hey, Daddy, There's A Creepo In The Outhouse

Man accused of climbing into pit toilet – again Yup, again. Somehow, like in the case of Des Moines Man Jumps Into River Again, the word "again" makes it even funnier.

Gary Moody had done this before, always saying that he had dropped something or other into the outhouse and that's why he was in there. But they could never find anything that he said he dropped, and he would always pop out of the pit under the john when a kid was in there. Eeewww.

I just love some of the quotes, quotes like "We don't have a file cabinet drawer full of things like this," as said by a guy from the forest Service Investigation Unit. Or this little passage.

"I asked Moody if he knew why we were there," Fors wrote. "Moody stated, 'I guess someone must have filed a complaint.' "

"I advised Moody that I understood that this was likely a difficult issue to talk about and that it was our intention to solve the problem of Moody getting caught in the pits of National Forest outhouses," Fors wrote.

According to Fors, Moody admitted that he had been in a toilet at the Hastings Campground on Memorial Day. Moody initially said he had dropped his shirt into the pit and climbed down to retrieve it.

That story was similar to one Moody had told authorities on June 26, 2005, when he was found in a toilet on U.S. Forest Service property in Albany, N.H. Moody said he climbed into the pit to retrieve his wedding ring, but officials cleaned out the pit, screened the contents and found no ring.

"I told Moody that I did not think that his trips into the outhouse pits had anything to do with dropping things by accident, and asked Moody if I was right,"
Fors wrote in the affidavit. "Moody said 'yes.' "

Moody admitted that he had gone into outhouse pits more than twice, Fors wrote. Moody said he never took photographs or videotaped people using the toilets, and he told Fors that he had not received counseling for what Fors called "the outhouse problem," according to the affidavit.

The poor Forest Services guy. I feel for him. And...eeewww. What a strange thing to do.